Like many women, I dreamed of being a Mom from the time I was very young. In high school, I mentally calculated when I would need to get married and start having kids if I was going to have X number of children by X age. When I met the man that I knew I was going to marry, I was shocked that he wanted to wait for a couple of years before having children. Didn’t men long to be dads just as much as I wanted to be a mom?!
We waited, but met in the middle on the time line. I am so thankful that we did. How was I to know that an intense period of infertility would take over our lives for a time? Yet, on we soldiered, marching toward our goal to become parents.
We are beyond blessed to have Jonathan and Faith in our lives. They mean the world to us, and I don’t think either of us regrets our decision to become parents. Even in the worst parenting moments, (see today’s post at www.adventuresintwinparenting.blogspot.com ) we recognize how much more full of life our lives are now.
But here is what confusses me. In all of the childbirth books, twin book and infant care books, everything I read lulled me into a false sense of control. I thought that if I followed the rules, kept the kids bellies nice and full, if their diapers and clothes were dry and comfortable, if the temperature was too their liking, if they got lots of cuddle time, and the appropriate amount of stimulation, that they would be HAPPY!
Instead, what I have come to learn in a short 11.5 months, is that my kids could be on schedule, rested, well fed, dry, physically comfortable and entertained, and they could still be unhappy! Seriously? What is up with that?! Sometimes I find myself reasoning with them…or thinking that one or both of them must have a mysterious incurable plague, because surely, children this young should not be screaming and pouting for that long without something being very awry.
Oh well, Lesson Number 1,537 on Mothering: You Can’t Make Your Kids Happy All the Time.
We at HDYDI would love to hear about the lessons you have learned as parents! Comments welcomed!