‘ll never forget her: A seasoned mom of six kids, the youngest two twins. She was at the same playground, looking just as frazzled as I. We chatted a bit. And then she said it — the words I live by often.

“I have six kids, I’ve been through it all and I can tell you that having twins is different; it’s hard,” she said.

As a new mother who doesn’t know any better, I needed to hear this last summer as my girls were just new to moving around and learning about their world. (I laugh now because I thought THAT was a hard age and all they ever did was stay by my side and stare at other kids.)

I try to only speak of the challenges I have about raising twins with other twin moms or from moms who genuinely seem interested in my well-being or in raising twins.

In other words, I try to use the twin card sparingly. All moms work hard — be it one baby or six. Babies are just a lot of work. Toddlers, too. I’ve been around moms who feel like their one is more challenging than my two. They may be right (on some level). I’ve been around moms who couldn’t care less about my difficulties because, frankly, they have their own. I also try to always counter my gripes with the positives, which these days is the fact that my daughters are now conversing with each other.

How about you? Do you use the twin card often? Or, do you tend to keep those little challenges or perks to yourself?