“You know, I think that having twins is, like, exponentially harder than having one. Not just twice as hard. Exponentially harder.”
That was a quote from my sister-in-law, beloved auntie to my twosome. Though she does not yet have kids of her own, she has spent a lot of time with mine and has seen first-hand a lot of the first two years with twins.
Her comment was in regard to a dear friend of mine, who arrives at my house with her husband and her baby tomorrow afternoon. This friend has been visiting family for the last few weeks, driving all over the Eastern seaboard with her now-one-month-old.
I can’t tell you how insane I thought that plan was. Bonkers. Ridiculous. And yet, as things seem to do for these friends, it seems to have worked out alright. And I realized, yet again, how very different my “newborn” experience was from most of the general population.
Because most of my mom-friends are people I’ve met through my local twin club, I am surrounded by people with similar experiences to my own. Preemies, perhaps? Some NICU time? Juggling the needs of two newborns, struggling with breastfeeding and bottle-feeding and sleep. Though I just put my head down and barreled through at the time (and thanks to formula and a night-owl husband, was better rested than many), I hardly realize how incredibly difficult it was.
And so, while I made it a point to get out of the house with my new babies, the prospect of being away from home for more than an hour or so at a time was positively ludicrous. The feeding schedule, the pumping, the weekly weight-checks at the pediatrician’s office.
Oh. Wait. That’s not exactly the norm. And while first-time singleton moms might have preemies or struggle with breastfeeding and the like, it would seem that life is so much more flexible with one single baby. So you go for a drive, they fall asleep in the car. Need to stop and nurse? No biggie. No need for a huge pillow so you can expose yourself while tandem-feeding. No concerns about feeding one and waking up the other. Just do what you need to do for that one child.
And while I still think my friends are a little crazy (in a very loving way) for this trip they’re on, I can only imagine how very different it must be. How different to just have one. I suppose I’ll never know.