What's mine and what's yours?

Posted on
Categories Family, Mommy Issues, Parenting Twins, Relationships

I’m going to be travelling next week to attend a conference. This is my first time away from the kids for longer than overnight. I’m looking forward to the chance to focus on work and the research I’ve worked on for the last few years. But, I’m also worried about being so far away from the kids for so long. I’m sure the novelty of not having to worry about potty visits, snacks and cleaning up toys will wear off fairly quickly, and I’ll miss them a lot.

But, before I can even get away for the conference, there’s a lot of organizing I need to do. It seems like it will take a dozen people to look after the kids while I’m gone. Between family, friends, our nanny and my husband, I know everything will be looked after and the kids will be cared for. But the logistics are quite complicated. I know my husband can look after his own children, but I want to make it as easy for him as possible since he’ll be looking after all the parenting responsibilities.

The need to put down things down on paper has reinforced how many things I do intuitively and naturally as part of my daily routine. Despite my attempts to include my husband in parenting decisions and my expectation that he does his share when he isn’t at work, there are things he rarely has to deal with. For example, I realized that I have all the health insurance cards and birth certificates in my wallet. I have the nanny and doctor’s phone numbers on my computer and in my cell phone. And, I know which cream is for regular diaper rash, which is for more serious diaper rash, which is for dry skin and which is for S’s rash on her foot.

My husband is definitely the expert on baths. He is able to get three kids clean and ready for bed, and they all enjoy the process completely. I, on the other hand, usually end up wet, frustrated and wondering what I’m going to do with these slippery bodies trying to escape my grasp.

What aspects of parenting are “yours” and “your partner’s”? Do you try to balance the responsibilities and make sure both parents are involved in childcare, or do you each have your own specialities?

Share this...Share on Facebook0Tweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+0Pin on Pinterest0Share on StumbleUpon0Share on Tumblr0Share on Reddit0Digg thisShare on LinkedIn0Email this to someone

4 thoughts on “What's mine and what's yours?”

  1. My husband and I definitely have our roles but they’re not your traditional ones. For instance, he’s the man of the morning. He gets up first and makes the coffee and sets out the “breakfast bar.” He sets out the fixings for lunch, too (my boys have been making their own since 2nd grade) and then he makes both his own and mine! (Bless his heart.) All this gives me ample time in the morning to work on my writing. I take over in the evening by making dinner. And then my sons each take a week with KP duty. We all pitch in to make the house hum.
    Christina Baglivi Tinglof recently posted “Which Twin is Older” Does It MatterMy Profile

  2. My husband is definitely better with the baths too. I am a stay-at-home mom so most of the parenting stuff is “mine.” I make all the meals, do a lot of the cleaning, all the laundry etc. I lay out the jammies and lotions and things for after the baths. This is funny because I’m going to be gone tonight and the hubby has get-the-babies-to-bed duty and I have been thinking of what I have to do: put something out for dinner for the girls, lay out bibs for them, lay out jammies/lotions/night diapers/eczema cream, make bottles. But after that, he has it covered. My husband rocks.
    Stephanie recently posted EhMy Profile

  3. Hubby has complete care of the girls 1/3 of their lives while I’m on duty at work for 24 hours. While he doesnt do things the same way i do, they all survive and have been since they were born. Its a challenge at time because we do things so different but they know what expect when each one of us is caring for them and the house.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge