Daycare Jitters for Momma

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Categories Childcare, Mommy Issues, Toddlers, Working

This September, my 14-month old twin daughters will start daycare. Up until this point, they have been at home with me and/or my husband, or with extended family. I was recently asked back to my previous company and was faced with the big decision of whether or not to “leave” the girls. I tried working full-time when the twins were 6-months old and it ended up being too hectic for us. Though the girls were at home with family, I couldn’t stand leaving before they woke and returning just before they went to bed. After trying to suck it up for a few months, we decided it was best if I stayed home. I loved my time home with the girls but also realize the effects it could have on my career if I was out of the job market for a long period of time. Granted, having twins is a good “excuse” for being out of work but, it’s a tough market out there!

I have worked it out with my employer that I will work one to two days a week from home. The girls will go to daycare just two days a week and my husband can watch them the extra day as he is a Firefighter and his schedule is quirky. We are very lucky in that we will only send them to daycare two days and I will be home two days. Honestly, I don’t think we could afford more than two days a week for each of them. Daycare costs are outrageous!

I have brought them to visit the daycare about three times in the past two weeks so they can adjust to going in and out of the building and so they recognize their teacher and the environment. Each time, the girls immediately leave my side and run (waddle, new walkers!) in to explore and check out the other kids. The first two times they didn’t even look to see if I was there and they cried when I made them leave. Obviously, we have no problem with socialization here. Is it awful that I wish they needed me more??

The third time my husband and I both brought them in and we left the room to work on paperwork. I could see them through the glass and they were playing very well. The instant we went back in to get them, “A” came to me crying and whining and clinging to my legs. Now I know this was all an act but I can’t help but feel guilty! I could see that it had just registered in her clever little brain that she was LEFT THERE! Her little sister (by 1 minute) was oblivious and again threw a fit when we made her leave the other children.

I have already returned to work and the girls are doing great at home with Daddy. They are napping and eating well and greet me with hugs and kisses. Though it seems they adjust well, I have this weight on my shoulders that is growing heavier as next week comes closer. I am dreading dropping them off. Perhaps this is harder on me than it is on them. I am taking solace in the fact that they will have each other; they can look around the room and see a familiar face in their sister.

At least they have each other!

Parents – how do you deal with the anxiety of dropping your children at daycare/school for the first time?

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7 thoughts on “Daycare Jitters for Momma”

  1. I have to admit, I have thought of going back to work part-time several times lately. But the thought of dropping my kids off at daycare is too much for me! I never went to daycare and neither did my husband so we have nothing to compare it to. No “well I always went to daycare and I turned out just fine” stories. That being said, I think that your girls will probably adjust fine. I mean, they may cry when you leave or not want to leave or whatever but I’m sure it won’t turn into a huge issue. Good luck!

  2. With our situation, we couldn’t afford to not have me work, especially with having twins. So my twins started daycare when they were only 10 weeks old. Dropping them off was just awful for me the first week. Once I got to work I had so much to do that my mind was busy with work and not thinking about my little bundles being cared for by someone else (someone I didn’t really know yet). I now look forward to Monday mornings when I can sit in peace and quiet with a cup of coffee. I actually find that I appreciate my time with them so much more.

    Recently we have had a day or two where one of my twins doesn’t want me to leave them at daycare. The teachers are experienced in this area and are good with pulling them into the toys and distracting them. Even if they are crying when I walk out of the room, by the time I finish signing them in they are having fun playing. It took awhile for me to build up trust with the teachers, but once I did everything became so much easier.

  3. My boys are 14.5 months as well, and I start work next week. Here we found daycare so expensive and hard to get into, that we hired a 2 day a week Nanny. It costs less! I’m also nervous, though I like our new Nanny and she comes with glowing references from her other family, a twins +2 family.

    Seriously, we went on the waiting list of a daycare at my husband’s work when I was pregnant, and we’re not near the top of the list…

  4. Awww, your girls look so much like mine did last year when they started Mother’s Day Out at 16 months! I maybe had it a little easier, since my mom is the one doing the drop off (I have to be at work before MDO starts). : )

    The teachers at our school really encourage a ‘hug, kiss, and run’ method. I can see how it’s much easier on the kids than a long and lingering drop off. Parents are always welcome to wait outside the door (out of sight!) to make sure their little ones stop crying…and almost all of them do within just a minute or two. Teachers for toddler classes are usually really loving and willing to “baby” the little ones a bit, especially during the adjustment period.

    Good luck!! I hope you have an easy transition and they come to love their school as much as my girls do now.

  5. Next week our girls start their mothers’ day out program, which will be the first time away from home for childcare. We’ve had 2 nannies at home, and a few sitters. I found with when my son when to the dayhome, it was important to take some time to transition when we got home. Even though we were in a hurry to get dinner, everything went smoother when we had some cuddle time and book together when we got home. Another suggestion, depending on your schedule, is to snack in the car on the way home, then have bath time right away. After bath you can make dinner when the kids are wearing pjs and ready for bed. Good luck with the transition back to work.

  6. I have to say your comments ease me about daycare! :) i begin work in one month and am the mother of fraternal 11 mth old twins and a four year old. They will all be attending the same daycare facility, however, the four year old will be in her own classroom and the twins, in the “baby” room. One spot opens up right away, the next spot, in 6 wks, so they will be there separatly for the first six weeks, then together. I was wondering if you had any other tips to make this transition a little easier on them, as well as myself! :) Thanks! and i very much appreciate any tips and tricks! :)

  7. Thank You for this interesting topic. Daycare it’s a really cool service for moms and kids (and not cheap). But we must understand that kids need parents love and attention anyway.

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