Wanted: 2 Bubbles for My 2 Boys’ Wibbly Wobbly Woes

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Categories Balance, Development, HDYDI Blog, Parenting, Parenting Twins, Prematurity, Preschoolers, ToddlersTags , , , , , , , ,

Wanted: Two Bubbles for My Two Boys

My preemie twin boys turned three years old recently. They are still working on catching up to the average three year old and we’re respectful of this fact and we work hard to help them along the way. It takes a lot of patience.

I mean a lot…

Of patience.

But there are those days when I am at a loss. My patience is worn thin. And I wish there was a bubble I could stick each of them in to protect them from themselves! I mean this in the kindest, gentlest and most protective mommy way. I love these little dudes and I hate to see them get hurt!

Case in point…last week, the end of a long, busy work week I found myself sitting in an Emergency Room waiting area for over 4 hours, past 12:00 AM, to have Twin A’s damaged eyebrow looked at and stitched up. Did he get hit in the head by a toy? No. Did he get in a scuffle with Twin B or big bro? No. He stepped on his own foot, lost his balance, and keeled over right onto the only kind of pointy edge on the baby gate…which is meant to protect him!

The boy is wobbly!

This event took place after a week of appointments and additional stress of both boys having allergic reactions to mosquito bites and becoming puffed up little children. First I thought I had to worry about West Nile Virus and now I have the additional worry of puffy little boys covered by gigantic swollen bites. Which then leave scars!

Then this evening we went out for a walk at the park. I slathered my boys in mosquito repellent in order to avoid West Nile and puffy reactions. My husband and I each manned a “baby” and kept an eye on the big boy. Three kids running in different directions on big, scary jungle gyms.

They are scary to me. Not to my kids.

It’s 3 against 2 in these situations and sometimes it really does feel like we’re losing from the start, so to speak. When we’re at these playgrounds the object of the game is to not get hurt. That is all. The level of stress can be high. The ability to relax can be hard.

We made it through the playground okay. No falls. No injuries. No tears. YES!

I relax…

Too soon.

No sooner do I turn my back to Twin B to take the big guy on a washroom run, when Twin B takes a single step, trips himself up and lands on his head. Not his bum. Not his side. He doesn’t try to break his fall in any way, shape or form; maybe because it happened so fast? Instead his head broke his fall. His head. The twins are not identical, but sometimes I do wonder. They do so many of the silliest things in the same ways. This is where the desire for a couple of nice, comfy bubbles made of Kevlar comes to mind. We try so hard to protect them from things, yet we know we can’t do it forever. So we try to relax.

When my three preemies came up in conversation when at a doctor’s appointment a few years ago, my doctor advised me to try to avoid being an over-protective parent, knowing that this is something many preemie parents deal with (she is a preemie parent herself.) Our little premature babies make it through the hardest of times and we want them to be safe and boo-boo free, but it’s hard to decide what really is “over-protective” vs. the average caring parent. Just like there is no specific instruction manual on dealing with a preterm birth, there isn’t one for raising preemie kids or any kid for that matter.

We just have to take it one step at a time…and hope we don’t fall flat on our faces!

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Carolyn - Twintrospectives

Carolyn is the full time working, volunteering, keeping active, Canadian mom of 5 year old twin boys and a 7 year old boy. Carolyn was introduced to the world of parenting in a rush, with the sudden arrival of her 31 weeker firstborn. Two years later, her twin boys thought they’d show up their older brother and showed their little faces at 27 weeks and in just as much of a hurry as their big brother! In just shy of two years Carolyn experienced the NICU twice for three little ones. The biggest lesson she took away from their NICU experiences was a lesson in patience. Carolyn learned to slow down, breathe and focus on the things that mattered; her little boys, her husband, her family. Although her twins experienced many hurdles while working their way through the NICU and she took them to close to two hundred appointments in that first year, Carolyn took time to reach out to the “preemie” community, which spans the globe. The unusual experience of having preemies and multiples has opened up all kinds of unique opportunities Carolyn never knew existed until she started her family. Carolyn has joined organizations promoting premature birth awareness, multiple-births awareness, chairs Multiple Births Canada’s Preterm Birth Support Network, writes a monthly newsletter for the Network, blogs and guest blogs, all in the name of NICU, preterm birth and multiple birth awareness. You can check out her blog at Twintrospectives.

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