Once, when J and M went down for their nap at age 2, I decided to take a nice long shower. I’d been having a hard time sleeping, so I thought a shower might help me take my own nap. As it turns out, I should have done more to confirm that M and J were asleep.
When I came out of the shower, I heard voices in the girls’ room, so I went to investigate.
M: Mama, I can’t clean the poop on the wall.
Me: The what on the what?
M: The poop on the wall.
Me: How did poop get on the wall?
M: I put it there.

M had gone number two in her diaper. She had then used half a package of wipes to clean herself, and in the process smeared the wall above her bed with fæces. Can I get an “Eeeeeewwwww” from the peanut gallery?
I never got a clear answer from J on her level of participation.
Just to be safe, both young ladies were bathed, and all the bedding and soft toys in the room and clothes on the girls made their way through the washing machine with copious quantities of bleach. I was glad I had an economy-size container of disinfectant wipes because the walls, as well as the dresser where the used diaper wipes were piled, needed it. For the record, satin sheen Behr paint cleans wonderfully!
At some point, J’s (clean and dry) diaper was changed. J reported that M changed it for her, and I must admit that she did a great job. One tab was attached a little crookedly, but I wouldn’t have known that I hadn’t put the diaper on J except that she’d been in a different brand when she went down for her nap.
This was one of the grossest experiences of my life.
I started out angry and grossed out. Once the wall and children were clean, though, I was able to get a little perspective. M was genuinely trying to clean up after herself. She was embarrassed by the mess she made. J tried to communicate to me what happened, although I struggled to understand the sequence of events.
Our babies grow up. They won’t learn without falling down a few times and making a few messes.
What’s been your grossest parenting moment?
Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun. She also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.
Sadly I’ve been there many times. My son just loved taking off his diaper and smearing it into the carpet, walls, crib, and dresser. Nothing stopped him, not even duct tape. Over the summer I was using the carpet cleaner after every nap. I almost lost my mind. Thankfully everyone is potty trained now so I can half smile about it. Maybe just maybe I’ll laugh about it one day.
Though I doubt it.
Oh, I’m sorry! I suspect you and Katelyn could trade stories! Now that I’m mostly done with kid poop, it’s the cat poop that’s getting me. One of my cats likes to go in the cabinet under the kitchen. If I keep it blocked off, he uses his litter box, but eeeew.
Hmm, changing each other’s diapers. If only I could teach my twins to do that!
Just one poop on the wall experience? Sounds amazing. Ours too, was a daily thing for a year. Daily carpet cleaning, wall scraping, bathing, frustration and tears. I wish poop on the wall was the grossest parenting experience but I am quite certain it isn’t. The time the boys BOTH decided to drink pee, that might be up there. (they deemed it yucky, thankfully, and didn’t do that again.)
Yep…smeared poop after a nap…that’s my grossest experience, too. That is also why my A was NEVER in anything but a onesie from the time she was 15 months, until she potty-trained at 27 months. NEVER. 😉
If ever the poop damage your wall, a repair is essential. Kidding aside, this is so cute.