“My kids are totally different,” I tell anyone who will listen.
Identical twins aren’t identical people, after all. They’re siblings who happen to have matching DNA and several months as wombmates.
One of my girls gets anxious more easily than the other. One is loving her Orff ensemble, while the other has us scheduled to attend a sculpture demonstration this weekend. One is all about T-shirts and sweatpants, while the other can spend an hour matching a new top to the perfect skirt.
In celebrating my twin daughters as individuals, I forget, sometimes, how similar they are. Their shared DNA, the shared crucible of our single parent home, and being in the same school and extracurricular programs all contribute to similar interests and abilities.
Girls Scouts: The Reality Check
I’m a Girl Scout leader. Exhausting though it is, I love it. I get to have 9 extra daughters, in addition to a supportive community of other adults who mentor girls from age 5 to 18.
Girl Scout meetings, field trips, and cookie sales have made me realize that my daughters are far more alike than different. While my troop runs the gamut in mathematical ability from struggling with subtraction to bored with basic algebra, my daughters are the ones who see math in everything they do. I see all sorts of behavior when the troop is together, but my girls tend to have the narrow repertoire of hard work, silliness, and sulking. My daughters are among the most extroverted in the troop. They’re also the shortest.
One of the moms in my troop is leading the Geocaching badge. I usually plan out badge work myself or help one or two of the girls come up with the plan. I thought it would be nice to share some hard-earned wisdom with the mom on her first badge-leading escapade:
Don’t assume all the girls have the same background knowledge. You may need to cover basics like “the world is a sphere” when explaining latitude and longitude.
Then I remembered that she has two kids of different ages. She deals with different levels of knowledge and ability every single day. She doesn’t need my advice on handling differences in ability. I’m the one who needed that advice, because I’m the one wearing identical twin blinders.
Would I parent differently if I had kids of different ages with a greater variety of talents and interests? I would definitely spend more time marveling at how similar my identical twin daughters really are in contrast.
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When twins are not identical, they can be liken to siblings growing up in the mother’s womb at the same time, they would have very different character (in most cases), and would be different phenotypically.
The only major difference in identical twins however is environmentally influenced (That’s going by the science).
Thanks for sharing this.
Micah recently posted Garmin Vivofit jr Your Day To Day Activity Tracker for Kids
I check in occasionally to see if there is anything new-lovely to read a post from you!
Sadia, we just came across your article … and couldn’t agree with you more! We understand this SO well, we’ve created a new twin clothing line guided by these beliefs. Twoborn will launch early this Fall, creating clothing for twins that celebrates their connection while expressing each child’s INDIVIDUALITY.
We believe you’ll find our story interesting. Feel free to go to http://www.TwoBorn. com and scroll down to read about us.
Moms of multiples stick together!
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The kids have separate characteristics in spite of having the same look. I think twins really don’t like to have the same clothes and imitate the actions of others. Let’s them free with their hobby!
Anne Kepner recently posted Top 4 Best Box Springs for 2017 with Reviews
My uncle have 3 twins , all of them are identical .
But there souls are very different , every one have its character
Mohamed Elhosary recently posted The 4 Best Orbital Buffer In 2017 – Reviews & Buyer Guide
Very insightful post. We are all different in our own ways, no matter how identical we are in physical trait.
Thanks for sharing.
Even they are twins but they definitely have their own characteristics and interests as well. Same age or same appearances don’t determine that they are in the same level of knowledge. People who have twins in their family will have to talk and share with them often to understand each of them. Especially, they should be free to choose whatever they want to spend time with. Nice post, Sadia!
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Yeah, kids are great source of energy too.
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