About Sadia

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 8-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun, when the girls entered elementary school and also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering. Google+

How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Party #48

Skip to this week’s links | Skip to featured posts | Skip to linkup rulesParenting Link Up Party


Last week’s featured posts:

Thanks to all who linked up. We’re looking forward to new posts from all of you this week and welcoming new linkers!

Last week‘s most clicked post was from HDYDI‘s very own Dory, who blogs at Doyle Dispatch about life with her sweet boy/girl twins, wonderful husband, crafting talents, and more. Dory wrote about cloth diapering and all that she’s learned through hands-on experience. If you’re new in your cloth diapering adventure, or are just considering it, check out her post for practical advice on what do to, what to avoid, and what might surprise you.

Parenting Link Up Pick: Practical pointers for those already cloth diapering and those considering it. Nothing beats experience when it comes to figuring out what works!

Joe over at Dad’s Guide to Twins wrote a wonderful post titled “Raising Twins Your Own Way” which really applies to all parents, those of twins, singletons, or sextuplets alike. He pointed out that doing things your own way doesn’t necessary mean rendering a deaf ear to all advice. Rather, it means taking only the advice that works for you. There is no right way to raise twins, or children in general. There’s only the way that works for your family.

Raising twins, or any kids, your own way means hearing advice and following what your instincts, or experience, tell you is right.

Practical Mommy‘s Kristen wrote a great post with ideas for introducing a new baby to your older kids. This is the fifth in her Parenting Lounge series, where she invites real moms to weigh in on parenting topics. I encourage all you expectant experienced parents to check out her post.

Tips from real moms on introducing the new baby to your older child.

If you were featured above grab our featured button and display it proudly on your blog!How Do You Do It? Featured Post

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Rules for the How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Up Party:

  1. Follow and connect with HDYDI on the social media platforms that you use. Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+ | Blog Lovin
  2. Follow the How do you do it? Parenting Link Up Board on Pinterest where we pin every link shared!
  3. Link up to 3 great parenting posts below! Please, no recipes posts. Of course, link directly to a post, not your main page. Also, under “name” put the title of your post, since that’s what will show up in the link up.
  4. Check out at least 3 other links! This is a party, so mingle!
  5. Leave an awesome comment for those you visit and tell them you found them at the HDYDI link party! And pin them/share the posts that you really like.
  6. Tweet: Add YOUR #parenting #advice to @hdydi's #linkup! Tell everyone #howdoyoudoit! http://ctt.ec/LRfWz+ #motherhood #momwisdomTweet about the link party using hashtag #hdydiparentingpin our link party badge, share it on Facebook, or otherwise promote this party.
  7. HDYDI Parenting Link Up PartyPut How Do You Do It?‘s Parenting Link Up badge on your site! Put it in your side bar, at the bottom of the post you shared, or on a party page.
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Foodie Friday: Schlotzsky’s Review and $25 Gift Card Giveaway

$25 Schlotzsky's gift card giveaway at http://hdydi.com My daughters and I don’t make a habit of eating out, so when we do go, it’s a treat. We have a relatively limited list of places we frequent, mostly because M is very particular about what she’ll eat.

When I mentioned to my 8-year-old twins that I’d been invited to a Schlotzsky’s blogger event to sample their new Italian menu items, my daughters cheered, very loudly. Very, very loudly. They both absolutely love the sandwiches there, and it doesn’t hurt any that Schlotzsky’s also serves Cinnabon buns. 8-year-old J is chowing down at Schlotzsky's We’re lucky to live in the Austin suburbs, a reasonable drive to Schlotzsky’s flagship location. Our usual location is across the driveway from the autoshop where I go for oil changes. A Schlotzsky visit is part of our monthly car maintenance routine when eating out is within our budget.

At the promotional event, we got to sample everything new on their menu, the Viva l’Italia line. I have to admit, it was hard to limit myself to just a taster’s bite of each dish. Any one of them would have made a delicious and satisfying meal. With these Italian offerings, including oven-baked pastas, pizzas and more, Schlotzsky’s is going well beyond the local sandwich joint we’ve known and loved. I’d now consider it a bakery café. Even the pickiest of eaters was delighted with the menu! Of course, this being a promotional meal, Schlotzsky’s put their best foot forward, but the food spoke for itself. My daughter M, the picky child, had three servings of the tomato basil canestrelli. She quite literally scraped her plate and told Chef Paul that she’d be coming back to order it again. He’s a member of the team that created these dishes, and his passion for quality was clearly quite as deep as his affection for children. M immediately adored him, although J was too busy chowing down to notice. Schlotzsky's tomato basil canstrelli is part of their oven-baked pasta line. While J joined me in sampling everything, M would try only one of the ciabatta sandwiches. (Oh my, were they good!) The Tuscan had avocado: “Yucky, mommy.” The Caprese had tomatoes: “I only like ketchup of tomatoes.” She consented to eat the Sicilian, but deconstructed, so as to get at the shaved ham, pepperoni and salami, while bypassing the provolone, roasted red bell peppers, balsamic onions, olives, pepperoncini, field greens and tomato. Usually, stock photos from restaurants bear little resemblance to the real thing, but our sandwiches looked just like these. The Tuscan_Ciabatta CapreseCiabattaThe Sicilian_Ciabatta See? Ciabatta sandwich tasting at Schlotzsky's So, M wasn’t sold on the sandwiches, although J and I were. The pasta, though? She loooooved the pasta. (So did I. There was this Andouille sausage and goat cheese pasta that makes me drool to just think about.) I’m tempted to keep going on and on about the pastas and the pizza and the desserts (Austin only), but I know you probably want to get to the gift card, so I’ll hold back.

Note that Schlotzsky’s has locations in 35 of the 50 states, in addition to Russia, Turkey and Azerbaijan. Please make sure that you have a local location before entering.

Use the Rafflecopter widget below to enter the giveaway. You could win a $25 Schlotzsky’s gift card. If you feel like using all the options, go for it. If you just want to put in the simplest possible entry, just leave us a comment on this post telling us about your favourite Italian food. You can follow us on Twitter, Facebook, or Pinterest, tweet about this giveaway, or leave a comment here or on another HDYDI post.

Please don’t forget to let us know in Rafflecopter which you’ve done so that your entries count!! In bocca al lupo e buon appetito. (Hey, two years of Italian in college is finally useful beyond listening to my favourite operas!)

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Why not up your chances by entering the #HoorayItaly contest? Schlotzsky’s is offering 10 $100 gift cards for selfies with their Viva l’Italia menu items.

Toddler Thursday: Eyes and Ears and Bananas and Nose

Is there anything more endearing than a toddler’s perspective on the world? Yes, my twin girls are big kids now at nearly nine years old, but a few blinks ago, they were toddlers. There are certain observations of theirs that live in a special vault of joy in my memory. I pull them out and look at them on occasion. This is one of those.

Meet Antelope, pronounced “Aninam” in the 23-month-old edition of M&J-ese. Antelope, along with 5 other animal hand puppets, was a gift from my high school English teacher when I found out I was pregnant. (Yes, I had awesome teachers. Who else not only stays in touch with former students in adulthood, but sends them gifts from continents away?)

A soft hand puppet in the shape of an antelope.

On the drive home from daycare, then 23-month-old M and I had this conversation:

M: Sissy Kwirro.
Sadia: Yes, J has Squirrel and you have Antelope.
M: Aninam.
Sadia: Antelope.
M: Aninam nose.
Sadia: Yep, Antelope has a nose, just like you.
M: Aninam eyes. Ooooone, twoooo eyes. Two eyes. Ears. Aninam oooone, twooo ears. Nana.
Sadia: Nana?
M: No. Nana!
Sadia: Nana?
M: No! Nana!
Sadia: Banana?
M: Yeah! Aninam nana!

Allow me to clarify.

At age almost 2, M labelled her toys body parts, subbing "banana" for "horn".When the word “horn” has yet to enter your vocabulary, “banana” will do just fine. This sort of creative usage of the words at your disposal is common to first language learners and adult second language learners alike, and is called circumlocution. Another great example is a toddler saying “wall on the top” when they haven’t yet learned “ceiling”.

What memory of toddler confusion brings you the greatest joy?

Wouldn’t Do Without Wednesday: gogo Kidz Travelmate

Today marks the beginning of a new occasional series, brainchild of our own MandyE. We’re calling it Wouldn’t Do Without Wednesday. (Insert your groan here, over my abominable abuse of alliteration.) In short, the HDYDI MoMs will share with you various products, services and tricks that have made our lives easier.

Wouldn't Do Without Wednesday at hdydi.com: This week, the gogo Kidz Travelmate.We will not accept advertising pitches. The stuff featured in Wouldn’t Do Without Wednesday consists of things we genuinely use, that we feel moved to share. We think you may not have heard of these items, or perhaps we’ve found secondary uses for household things that you might like to try.

gogo Kidz Travelmate

My pick for this week is the gogo Kidz Travelmate. Forgive the goofy spelling and capitalization. This contraption attaches to your convertible or toddler car seat, and its wheels essentially turn your car seat into a temporary stroller. In my opinion, if you’re flying with multiple toddlers, you have to invest in a few of these.

With my children asleep in their car seats, I was able to get from airplane door to my car without waking the twins. The only help I needed was that of the flight attendant who sat with one child while I carried the other out, carseat and all. It took a little creative positioning to drag a seat and suitcase behind me in each hand, but it worked.

gogo Kidz Travelmate in use. This is the easiest way to get a car seat through the airport.I wouldn’t recommend the Travelmate for everyday use. You probably still want a stroller. For getting through the airport, though, I have yet to see anything better than the Travelmate. I’m a big proponent of having non-lap baby smaller children fly in their car seats over being loose in the airplane seat. At least for my kiddos, being in the familiar confines of the car seat was a sign of the behaviour expected of them, and there was no risk of them sliding out. Plus, our car seats weren’t going to be crushed or mishandled in transit

Here’s how I used mine:

  1. When the Travelmates arrived in the mail, I grabbed my screwdriver and attached the bottom to the handle.
  2. The kids rode to the airport as usual.
  3. When we got out of the car, quickly attach the Travelmate to the back of the car seat.
  4. We rolled through the airport, stopping at least 10 times to answer questions about where you got this miracle
  5. Security was the biggest pain, which should come as no suprise. I had to take the pieces apart because our Britax Marathons wouldn’t go through X-ray otherwise, but it took only seconds to put it back together. Of course, the kids had to get out of the seats to go through security.
  6. I wheeled the car seats quite literally to out seats, one pushed in front of my and one dragged behind down the plane aisle.
  7. I popped off the wheels, stuck them in my carry-on and installed the car seats using the airplane seat belts.
  8. I then did everything backwards at the other end of the flight.

gogo Kidz Travelmate

 

Have you ever used the Travelmate? Did you find it as useful as I did?

Resenting Gifted Children

Profoundly Gifted

My identical twin daughters, now nearly 9 years old, have both been identified as being profoundly gifted. This is an extraordinary, well, gift. School comes easily to them and they both love to learn. They’re voracious readers, and they retain everything. They’re more than happy to accompany me to public astronomy lectures, and “let’s research that” is a phrase that’s said at least once a day in our home.

When it comes to discipline, I can reason with M and J. At 8 years old, they are intellectually capable of understanding it when I explain the psychological underpinnings of my approach to setting boundaries and expectations for them.

“You have to be strict with us,” my daughter J once told me, “so that we’ll be able to make good decisions when we’re grownups. I know you have rules because you love us.”

Kids

Despite their intellectual abilities, they are still little girls. They have to be nagged to floss and brush their teeth every night. They get their feelings hurt on the playground and can spend hours playing pretend. They believe in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. They needed me to inform them that Star Wars was, in fact, not a historical account.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. The opening crawl to Star Wars.

The vast majority of people they come across are incredibly supportive. While often initially taken aback by the insights in my daughters’ observations, most friends and strangers alike will adjust their conversational expectations and meet J and M where they are. Their best friend A almost always introduces them as “my friends who are super smart, but they’re really fun too!”

Resentment Demonstrated

Unfortunately, some people are intimidated by my daughters’ giftedness. Even more unfortunately, some of these people are adults whom M and J love and want to trust. They don’t always handle their resentment well.

J’s recent Pi Day project led her to find out how to calculate the volume of a sphere. While asking Google for the formula may seem rather mundane to those of us with high school geometry under our belts, 8-year-old J was beside herself with excitement. She told everyone she was close to about her plan, and nearly everyone caught her enthusiasm.

One person, though, wounded her deeply. This adult, on hearing her plan to calculate the volume of the sun, repeatedly told her that this exercise would be beyond her abilities. J attempted to demonstrate that she was prepared, explaining what π was, describing what a volume is, talking about her love of exponents. Her conversational partner was having none of it. Finally, the person found something J didn’t know to put the final nail in the conversational coffin: order of operations. J was devastated.

I explained to J that the concept of order of operations was something that she knew inherently, just not by that name. Some people, including the adult who’d so hurt her, needed to be taught the steps in which to perform stacked mathematical operations. To her, it was as obvious as the existence of negative numbers. I told J that I was confident in her ability to take on her project.

She and I elected to talk through her sadness with her friend A’s mom, who may be one of the most compassionate people I’ve ever met. J poured out her heart. In short, she felt that the adult in question hadn’t listened to her. Even as she explained what she already knew, the adult had told her that she couldn’t possibly know enough, trying to teach J things she had already demonstrated understanding.

A’s mom recommended that J tell the person who had hurt her how she felt, but that it was okay to protect her heart.

A’s mom pointed out that the adult might have been intimidated by J’s knowledge. This person may have been rusty on their geometry and been unwilling to confess their own ignorance. Our dear friend told J that she didn’t understand all of the mathematical details that J had spelled out when explaining her project, but that she was excited that J was excited and was proud that J was so comfortable with math. A’s mom knows her own strengths, and isn’t particularly concerned that math isn’t one of them.

Coming to an Understanding

While talking to me and A’s mom about the incident made J’s immediate pain manageable, it continued to haunt her for over a week. She was visibly sad. While it was pretty clear to me that the person who had hurt her had done so out of personal insecurity, J felt that she had done something wrong.

I decided it was time to turn this into an academic exercise. While M played on my iPad, J and I sat down together at the computer. We wrote down what J was feeling:

This adult doesn’t want to listen to what I have to say. They don’t think I’m smart enough to understand π.

Next, I encouraged her to come up with some alternate explanations.

This adult can’t hear very well.

This adult was having a bad day.

This adult doesn’t understand what I say. They don’t understand π.

Next, J wrote in her observations from the conversation. The only explanations that they all fit was the last one: The adult didn’t understand the math and was embarrassed to admit it.

Over the last days of Spring Break, J perked up. I asked her how she was feeling about the whole situation.

“I learned a new expression,” she told me. ‘Misery loves company.’ It means that grumpy people want everyone around them to be grumpy too. I won’t keep grumpiness company.”

I’m sure this is only one of many incidents in which my children’s giftedness will brings challenges their way, in addition to making many things come easier to them than it does to many of their peers. I wish I could protect my girls from hurtful situations like these, but part of me is glad that they’re dealing with them now, while I can still guide them towards a place of peace. As J said at the top of this post, she and her sister will need to make good decisions when they’re grownups.

What do you do when you feel that your children have been wronged?

How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Party #47

Skip to this week’s links | Skip to featured posts | Skip to linkup rules Parenting Link Up Party


Last week’s featured posts:

Thanks to all who linked up. We’re looking forward to reading a whole bunch more from all of you this week! Last week‘s most clicked post was from Joyful Mud Puddles. Meaghan described her day at home with her boys. It was atypical in that they didn’t have any activities outside the home. Lego play, gardening, some calendar-based counting, dancing, and reading. I loved Meaghan’s confession that she forgot to make dinner, so her husband stepped in with pancakes. A day in the life of a loving family New linker Heather from One Crazy Ride had me in stitches with her piece titled “Shopping with Toddlers Is Like Being a Contestant on a Terrible Game Show.” Just make sure you’re not drinking water or anything else when you read it. I shared it with my 8-year-old daughters and they, too, thought it was hysterical. I had to put my foot down when they asked me to read it out loud for a fourth time in a row. Hilarious and totally accurate description on  taking toddlers to the grocery store.   Uncommon Grace‘s SaraLynn has been through the ringer of late. She’s still suffering from the physical aftermath of an October car accident. She’s been putting off a lot as she waits to heal. In this beautiful piece about faith, she reminds us that sometimes, we need to stop waiting. The perfect time for whatever it is we’re putting off may never come. She’s risen to this challenge before, becoming a foster parent even when the timing wasn’t ideal. So, despite her pain, she’s back to blogging. Please stop by her blog and say hi. A reminder that if we wait for the perfect time, we'll be waiting forever. Take the leap and do what seems hard. If you were featured above grab our featured button and display it proudly on your blog! How Do You Do It? Featured Post

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Rules for the How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Up Party:

  1. Follow and connect with HDYDI on the social media platforms that you use. Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+ | Blog Lovin
  2. Follow the How do you do it? Parenting Link Up Board on Pinterest where we pin every link shared!
  3. Link up to 3 great parenting posts below! Please, no recipes posts. Of course, link directly to a post, not your main page. Also, under “name” put the title of your post, since that’s what will show up in the link up.
  4. Check out at least 3 other links! This is a party, so mingle!
  5. Leave an awesome comment for those you visit and tell them you found them at the HDYDI link party! And pin them/share the posts that you really like.
  6. Tweet: Add YOUR #parenting #advice to @hdydi's #linkup! Tell everyone #howdoyoudoit! http://ctt.ec/LRfWz+ #motherhood #momwisdomTweet about the link party using hashtag #hdydiparentingpin our link party badge, share it on Facebook, or otherwise promote this party.
  7. HDYDI Parenting Link Up PartyPut How Do You Do It?‘s Parenting Link Up badge on your site! Put it in your side bar, at the bottom of the post you shared, or on a party page.
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Discount Programs for Multiples

We’re trying something new. We’d like to elicit your help in developing the definitive list of discount programs for multiples. Know about a company that offers discounts or freebies for families of multiples? Add it below yourself! Have you learned that one of the items on our list is out-of-date? Please leave a comment on the item and we’ll retire it.

Above all, though, take advantage of these offers. Most of the gifts and coupons are most helpful in the first year, so don’t wait. Have a friend expecting multiples? Perhaps you could offer to handle getting them signed up for these offers as (part of?) your baby shower gift. You will probably have to wait until the babies are born, but I certainly could have used the help as a new mom of twins!

Twinfant Tuesday: How to Afford Formula

7 ideas for saving money on formula, with a particular emphasis on twins, triplets and more... because families of multiples need extra help!Babies are expensive. Next to diapers and daycare, infant formula may be the number one expense. Yes, we all know that “breast is best” but the fact is that exclusive breastfeeding simply isn’t an option for all of us. Many MoMs simply can’t produce enough milk for multiple babies, while for others, the logistics of breastfeeding several babies while providing for their other needs puts nursing beyond reach. Those of us who gave birth prematurely know that preemies and breastfeeding don’t always mix.

Six months worth of formula for just one baby averages out at $860 in the US and ranges from $510 to $3062 in Canada. Now multiply that cost to account for our multiple babies, and I start to feel a little sick.

Unfortunately, I have no magic wand to make this all better, but here are what other MoMs have done to maximize the bang for their formula buck.

  1. Breastfeed/pump. Even a little helps, if you can maintain your sanity while nursing or pumping. Many insurance companies now cover breast pumps and associated supplies, so pumping can be practically free, aside from the additional food you’ll eat to make that milk. Breastfeeding actually requires more calories than pregnancy, I was surprised to learn.
  2. Government assistance. There are two types of US food assistance that may apply to families with infants: WIC (Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants and Children) and SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, formerly Food Stamps).Even if you don’t qualify for SNAP (income is 130% of poverty or less), you may qualify for WIC, so do your research. WIC serves 53 percent of all US-born infants, so your chances are good!

    While implementation varies by state, WIC generally provides families with vouchers for high-nutrition items, including formula for infants who are not exclusively breastfed.

    In Canada, social assistance recipients may be additionally eligible for special financial assistance in buying formula, depending on province. Regular, soy-based and lactose-free formulas are all covered, although additional medical documentation may be required for those last two types. This is in addition to the universal child care benefit of $100/month for any child up to the age of 6.All current HDYDI authors live in the US or Canada.

    If you have information about government support for formula-fed infants in your country, please let us know in the comments.

  3. Free samples. Doctors and hospitals are well supplied with formula samples from companies trying to get you committed to their brand, usually in full-size containers. Don’t be too proud to ask for additional free samples when you exhaust the supply that you may have received in the first few days. Keep in touch with the lactation consultants at your hospital. They can hook you up! Yes, they’re professionals committed to breastfeeding success, but they’re all about making sure babies are nourished. Also consider contacting formula manufacturers to request samples. I’ll talk more about making a multiples-specific pitch below in number 6.
  4. Shop around. Here’s a big secret: you don’t have to commit to a formula brand. Formula is like any other food product. The generic stuff is usually comparable to the brand name, at a lower cost. With the more expensive brands, you’re more likely paying for better marketing than improved quality. Find out whether a warehouse club like Sam’s Club or Costco is worth the cost of membership in formula savings. Buy formula in bulk when it’s on sale, being aware of the expiration date, of course. Maybe purchasing formula through Amazon’s Subscribe and Save service may save you cash. Perhaps your local grocery store has good deals on its store brand formula. A lot of store brand formula lines now include soy and lactose-free offerings. Those of us who need high-calorie preemie formula probably still need to go with the brand names.
  5. Coupons. I have a love-hate relationship with coupons. As a user of in-store coupons when I see them, I just wish that stuff would be offered at the lower price point without the hassle of having to scrounge and clip… or at least that coupon savings would be automated at the register. When it comes to formula, though, coupons can save you a whole bunch. Check out formula company websites, and consider following the Baby Formula Coupons Facebook page. Jen Wood mentioned that her Mother of Multiples club had a coupon exchange table at every meeting where parents could drop off their unused coupons for other parents to use. Why not start something similar in your community?
  6. Manufacturers’ multiples programs. A number of the major formula and baby food manufacturers offer programs specific to multiple birth families, usually in the form of free samples or coupons. You need a doctor’s referral to qualify for the Enfamil program, which provides a case of formula per baby. Call 1-800-4-GERBER to sign up for the Gerber Multiple Births program, which includes Gerber Good Start formula. This post at The Krazy Coupon Lady even has a letter composed for you to send to companies that don’t have an official program.
  7. Insurance. Don’t forget to look into your medical insurance options. Especially if you have a child or children with special dietary needs, such as those associated with premature, food intolerances, or allergies, you insurance may cover part of all of your formula expenses.

Do you have a penny-pinching approach that we’ve missed?

How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Party #46

Skip to this week’s links | Skip to featured posts | Skip to linkup rules

Parenting Link Up Party

Welcome to this week’s How Do You Do It? parenting link party. This is your opportunity to share your posts with and learn from other parent bloggers and the wonderful community of How Do You Do It?.

How do you do it? is a community of mothers of multiples: twins, triplets and higher order wombmates. We believe in mutual support, in sharing our experiences and questions, in lasting friendships, and in encouraging each other. The link up is open to all our readers, whether or not you are a parent or have multiples. Here, we invite you to share your wisdom, your favorite posts, and your insights with our online community here at HDYDI.

Each week, we pick some of our favorite posts to feature from the week before here on our site. Plus, we pin them on Pinterest, tweet them on Twitter, and share them onGoogle+ and Facebook! Get some more exposure for your great content, and don’t forget to check out the featured posts below from last week’s link up!

Each HDYDI parenting link up party accepts new links from Monday morning through Friday.

So tell us: What’s your crafty trick of the week? What parenting insight were you struck with? What’s been bugging you lately? What phase did your child just enter? How do you make time for yourself? What are you prioritizing this week?

How do you do it?!


Last week’s featured posts:

Thanks to all who linked up. We’re looking forward to seeing more from all of you this week! It was hard to pick our favourites.

Last week‘s most clicked post was from Gauthier Land. Stacey’s July announcement that her third pregnancy would be ushering a SECOND set of twins into her family was pretty stupendous. Little Josh is left the truly solo singleton, sandwiched between two sets of twins. Mind-boggling.

Imagine - finding out that you're having a SECOND set of twins!

Wondermom Wannabe shared a wonderful printable for getting all the important information to your babysitter. I’m sure my beloved babysitter Angie would have just loved it if I had such a thing at my disposal a few years ago, when I instead left her with 3 typed pages, single spaced, along with my twin daughters to babysit.

A free printable for your babysitter, making sure all the important stuff gets covered!

Ashley at A Party of Four shared the most adorable snack ever: her Pixie Dust Popcorn. While she busted this sparkly concoction out for a Tinkerbell movie night, I can’t help thinking that it would be beyond perfect for St. Patrick’s Day tomorrow.

A perfect St. Patrick's Day snack... or any day for your local wing-wearing, wand-waving fairy.

Oh, the adorable, sparkly, magical deliciousness!

If you were featured above grab our featured button and display it proudly on your blog!

How Do You Do It? Featured Post

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Twinfant Tuesday: How Motherhood Affects Your Social Life

I thought that I had a decent idea of what motherhood would be like. I was nothing like the Tacoma, Washington woman who wrote to advice columnist Carolyn Hax (full text).

My only sibling is nearly 11 years younger than me, so I’d done my share of diaper changing, potty training, and homework help as a pre-teen and teenager. I knew twins would be more work, of course, but becoming a mother seemed another small step in my progression to full adulthood. I’d gotten married, finished grad school, started my career, built a house and gotten pregnant, all within a couple of years. One close friend had ditched me when I got married, but that was the only casualty of all these life changes. I imagined that becoming a mother would have a similarly minor impact on my friendships.

I was completely clueless.

I had no clue how all-consuming parenthood is. I had no idea how rewarding it is. I had no idea how completely everything would change. And I confess that I gave very little thought to the impact my becoming a mother would have on my friendships.

It's impossible to understand how much life changes on becoming a parent, and friendships necessarily change in parallel.

I was one of the truly lucky new mothers out there on the friendship front. My closest friends took my babies in stride, completely welcoming them into all social activities. One of them, Kaylan, even moved in with us after a bad breakup when my daughters were just a few months old. She understood why it took me three hours to make it through a single sandwich and why I had to get up to retrieve a crying child or two mid-sentence. My dear friend Sara and I went through our pregnancies together, giving birth 14 days apart. Our husbands deployed to Iraq together, so we were in exactly the same place in our lives, even though she was a stay-at-home mom and I worked outside the home full-time.

I wasn’t much of a drinker or partier, and chatting over a meal in someone’s home or a restaurant was relatively easy with two easygoing, if premature, infants in tow. My good friends thought nothing of my getting up from the group to change a couple of diapers or of my briefly turning away to latch a baby on. The majority of my friends live a good distance from me, so I was able to maintain those friendships by telephone while breastfeeding my nurslings.

There were friends, though, who drifted away. The folks who wanted to go to the movies or a bar or do something active on relatively little notice, I could simply no longer accommodate. Friends who wanted a leisurely meal with me sitting in one place and making eye contact throughout a conversation found new friendships. Those friends who wanted my undivided attention could now afford none of my attention at all. Those friends who wanted just Sadia, not Sadia-the-mom, moved on. Some of them re-entered my life when they had children a few years later. Others, I check in with every so often. And with some, I have simply parted ways.

Yes, I miss those friends, and occasionally wish they understood why I have so much less time for them. I wish that they, like those friends who have stuck around, had become virtual family to my daughters, M and J.

Far deeper, though, are the friendships that have come to me because of motherhood. The neighbours I merely smiled when I moved in pregnant have become beloved friends, people who took the 9-hour road trip to see us when we briefly moved away. Their children are like siblings to mine. We raised our children together. Our kids peed on each other’s floors and in our yards during the Age of Potty Training. There is no friendship more precious than that. The incredible parents I have met through my daughters’ school and extracurricular activities have become our family. These friendships, born of middle-of-the-night ER visits, shared moments of parental pride, and exchanges of discipline and encouragement strategies, are just as strong as the friendships that stuck through my transition to motherhood.

Many parents need friendships outside the context of parenthood. For me, these relationships are fulfilled at work, and my entire social life beyond the workday revolves around my daughters. The people I enjoy spending time with are also those who I want around my children. I am deeply blessed to have friends who are as likely to look forward to spending time with my children as with me, and I enjoy their children’s company just as much. When we offer to babysit each other’s children, it’s as much for the pleasure of the children’s company as it is to help our friends out. Our children repay our affection. My daughters will occasionally want to discuss weighty matters with both me and a friend’s parent. My friend’s children will ask me to send me a picture of their report cards when they’re especially proud of their performance.

To the new parents who are discovering the impact of parenthood on your friendships, I would encourage you not to consider those who draw back as fair weather friends. They just don’t feel comfortable following you into the parenting stage of life. They may come back later, when they catch up. And I promise you that new, lasting friendships are just around the corner.

How did parenthood impact your pre-existing relationships?