About Sadia

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun, when the girls entered elementary school and also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.

Bye Bye Blankie

Blankie
My daughter J is the snugglier of my twins. She’s sought tactile comfort more than M starting at a few months old. She’s always had two lovies, a simple flannel blanket with a satiny border named Purple Blankie and a little bear blanket named Green Bee. Never mind that Purple Blankie has no more purple in than green, yellow or blue.

On our move to El Paso 3 years ago, Green Bee got lost. I waited it out for a while, hoping that J would realize she didn’t need her lovey any more, but she begged for a replacement every day. After several months, when Daddy announced our divorce, I decided that this was not the time to break my child of her comfort objects. Enter Fuzzy.

The green one is Fuzzy.

The green one is Fuzzy.

About a month ago, I noticed that Purple Blankie and Fuzzy haven’t been appearing in bed. In fact, I’m not quite sure where Fuzzy is, and Purple Blankie is hanging out in J’s stuffed toy box.

It may have taken nearly 8 years, but J seems to be growing out of the need for comfort objects. Maybe this explains her anger of late. She may be working on new ways to channel her stress.

Do your little ones have comfort objects or loveys?

Last Call for This Year’s Infertility Awareness Week Contributions

We asked for stories of infertility to honour Infertility Awareness Week, and you guys have delivered! We’ve got a great week of beautiful, varied and sometimes difficult posts coming up.

The door’s still open, though, if you’ve been thinking about contributing. Just email us your contribution, whether it’s text or a link to a post you’d like re-published here.

You can see more details at our Infertility Awareness Week 2014 page.

Stories of infertility on How Do You Do It?

Locate Your Mother of Multiples Club

Links to local Mother of Multiples club finders around the world.

I’ve come across a number of new mothers of multiples recently who need practical support. They’re overwhelmed and turning to the internet for help. I can provide all sorts of ideas and recommendations to them to ease the weight of new motherhood, but unless they live reasonably near me, I can’t feed a baby, help with laundry or offer a hug.

To each of them, I or others have recommended reaching out to their local Mother of Multiples club. Other MoMs just get it. We’re willing to help mothers we’ve never met before in the most unglamourous and useful of ways. Also, seeing other mothers who’ve survived the infant months is a ray of hope.

The question that many of these moms have asked is how to go about finding a MoM group in their area. Here’s a very incomplete list of resources for new MoMs to help locate a local club. I limited myself to countries where I know there to be an active mothers of multiples community where they speak a language I actually know!

The first place I’d recommend American mothers look is the Multiples of America (formerly National Organization of Mothers of Twins Clubs or NOMOTC) Locate a Club page. You just put in your zip code and get back a list of clubs.

If you’re in Canada, you can see a map of Multiple Births Canada’s local chapters on their website.

The Australian Multiple Birth Association also has a Club Finder on their website.

In the UK? The Twin & Multiple Birth Association (Tamba) has its own map of local clubs.

The Irish Multiple Births Association website isn’t the most usable, but they do tell you where on the site to find a list of local clubs.

The South African Multiple Birth Association is structured much more centrally. Once you register to join the national organization, you’ll get a phone call from a member and I assume you can find out more about what’s available locally from her.

In you’re in France, Jumeaux et Plus has a nice clickable map that takes you directly to your local club’s website, if it has one.

If there’s nothing nearby (my hunt in India turned up blank), ask your pediatrician or obstetrician to connect you with another mom of multiples. Two moms makes a club, in my mind! And if you still find no one nearby who understands what you’re going through, we hope you’ll consider the HDYDI community home.

How can we locate MoM clubs in your country?

Minor Illness: Better Unconsolidated

“Mommy! It’s weird enough staying home on a Monday school day, but staying home without M is even weirder!” my daughter J told me while munching on dry rice cereal this morning.

We didn’t have the weekend we’d hoped for. I went to the gym Saturday morning, as planned. We spent part of the morning cleaning the house, then stopped by a store for a birthday present before getting on the road to a friend’s birthday party. About a mile from the house, I heard a sound from the back seat. I looked in the rearview mirror, and poor little M was vomiting. When she could finally catch her breath, she began to cry. “I wanna go home. Mommy, take me home.”

I was stuck at a red light in a turn lane, helpless to comfort her. As soon as I could, I turned the car around and headed home. I talked to her the entire very long mile home and she just took turns throwing up and crying. I opened J’s window for her when she began to gag. Thankfully, her breakfast stayed down.

As we pulled into our driveway, I told J that I needed her to fend for herself while I tended to her sister. I unlocked the door and let J in, then returned to the car to lift my sobbing, retching, vomit-covered M straight into the bathtub. By this time she was apologizing for the mess in the car, which I told her not to worry about. I got the shower set to a comfortable temperature, helped take off M’s clothes, then left her in the warm water to throw the soiled clothing in the washing machine. I washed the puke out of her hair and helped her wash her skin, which had her feeling much better. She asked to wear her pajamas, pathetically telling me she really didn’t want to go out again that day.

While she dressed herself, I pulled the nasty car seat out of the car. As I was pulling the cover off, I heard a wail from the girls’ room. M had thrown up again, this time on the carpet. I comforted her, dressed her, and tucked her under covers on the couch with a big bowl in her lap in case she felt nauseated again. The car seat cover went in the washing machine too, and I started it on the sanitary cycle. Then I took my carpet cleaner to the spot on the carpet.

M wanted me to hold her, which I did for a while, feeling her grow steadily warmer in my arms as she took breaks to throw up. I took her temperature, which was a miserable 102°F. Fortunately, she was able to keep a dose of ibuprofen down. By this time, J insisted that she was bored. I gave her a number of ideas for activities, but she wanted me to play with her. When M felt better, I hosed off the car seat and cleaned the car upholstery and carpet and then played a few rounds of Funglish with the girls.

(The things we moms do… comfort babies, clean up vomit, provide security and medical care. I would have never guessed this would become second nature and feel completely manageable. This stuff is easy after twinfancy!)

The next morning, M had her appetite back and was ready for cereal. The fever didn’t return, and by evening she was her normal goofy dancing self… but not before her sister began to complain of a headache, completely lose her appetite, and run her own fever.

Fortunately, J never threw up, but I elected to keep her home from school today. Daycare rules have been drilled into me for all time. No kids in school until they’ve been fever-free for 24 hours.

M tried to convince me to let her stay home, but was more than happy to go to school when she realized she wouldn’t have to go to after-school care. And that brings me back to the beginning of this post.

“Mom,” J told me, pondering the clock, “In a few minutes, M will be starting science.” An hour later, I got an update. “Now, M will be writing in her journal.”

I found it intriguing that J didn’t seem particularly concerned with what she was missing or what the class was doing. Her focus was on M’s activities. One of those twin things, I suppose.

When illnesses are minor like this, it’s so much easier to have one child be sick at a time.

How do you do it? Parenting Link Up #20

Skip to this week’s links | Skip to featured posts | Skip to linkup rules

Welcome to the How Do You Do It? parenting link up party. Here, you have an opportunity to share your posts with other parent bloggers and the followers of How Do You Do It? and What’s up Fagans?.

How do you do it? is a community of mothers of multiples that believes in supporting each other, in sharing our experiences and questions, in friendship, and in encouragement. The link up is open to all of our readers, whether you have multiples or not, where you can share your wisdom, your favorite posts, your insights, with our online community here at HDYDI and What’s up Fagans?.

Each week, we pick some of our favorite posts and feature them the following week on our site! Plus, we pin them on Pinterest, tweet them on Twitter, and share them on Google+ and Facebook! Get some more exposure for your great content, and don’t forget to check out the featured posts from last week’s link up!

Plus, ldskatelyn of What’s up Fagans? is co-hosting our link party on her blog as well. One party on two blogs means double the exposure and community.

Each HDYDI parenting link up party accepts new links from Monday morning through Friday at noon.

So tell us: How do you handle conception, pregnancy, prematurity, birth, and postpartum recovery? How do you handle tantrums, diapering bills, stress, and potty training? How do you handle education and special needs? How do you balance the needs of several children with a marriage? How do you manage being a stay-at-home mom, a working mom, or a single parent? And how do you find time for yourself?

How do you do it?!


This week’s featured posts:

We had 30 thought-provoking and inspiring posts last week. We try to pick 3 posts for feature that have the widest applicability for our readers. Thank you for all the great stories of births, pregnancies, mishaps, and other life experiences. Keep sharing your insights, questions, stories and contemplations.

Great ideas for finding your way back to self-fulfillment in the chaos of motherhood.Our most clicked post from last week was from our What’s up Fagans? hostess Katelyn  titled 5 Ways to be Happier as a Stay-at-Home Mom. She allowed herself to be vulnerable in describing a feeling many mothers have had, the feeling of losing oneself in the role of mother and wife. Her recommendations for finding self-fulfillment in day-to-day SAHM life were universal and on point. Even if you’re feeling pretty well-balanced and happy where you are, I’d recommend giving Katelyn’s post a read.

5 spring activities for parents and kids to share! from A Lavender LifeCarolyn at A Lavender Life shared her 5 Ways to Bond with Your Kids this Spring. I loved that she included a combination of activities that can be done inside or outside. Her recommendations were simple and low-budget, easily adjusted to different climates, family interests, and even seasons. Check out her post and say hi!

Guide for your childcare provider while you take a well-earned break!Mommy Life After PhD‘s Jennifer quite literally had me laughing out loud with her post spelling out the basics of childcare for Nana. Jennifer and her husband are taking off on an anniversary trip, and her mom will be wrangling the children in their absence. Underneath the funny is a very basic truth. Especially when you’re unaccustomed to caring for children full-time, just keeping them alive is the only requirement. Everything else can wait until you have that under control. Seriously, go check out this post and treat yourself to a good belly laugh. Just make sure you’re not drinking anything while you read it.

If you were featured above make sure to grab our featured button and display it proudly on your blog! How Do You Do It? Featured Post


Parenting Link Up Party

Rules for the How Do You Do It? Parenting Link Up Party:

  1. Follow and connect with HDYDI on the social media platforms that you use. Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+ | Blog Lovin
  2. Follow and connect with What’s up Fagans? on the social media platforms you use: Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Google+ | Blog Lovin’
  3. Link up to 3 great parenting posts below! Please, no recipes posts! Of course, link directly to a post, not your main page. Also, under “name” put the title of your post.
  4. Check out at least 3 other links! This is a party, so mingle!
  5. Leave an awesome comment for those you visit and tell them you found them at the HDYDI link party! And pin them/share the posts that you really like.
  6. Tweet: Add YOUR #parenting #advice to @hdydi's #linkup! Tell everyone #howdoyoudoit! http://ctt.ec/LRfWz+ #motherhood #momwisdomTweet about the link party, pin our link party badge, share it on Facebook, or otherwise promote this party! The more the party grows, the more exposure your posts will receive, the more fun you’ll have, and the more encouragement and ideas we’ll all receive!
  7. HDYDI Parenting Link Up PartyPut How Do You Do It?‘s Parenting Link Up badge on your site! Put it in your side bar, at the bottom of the post you shared, or on a party page!


1500: A Milestone

One thousand five hundred.

This is the 1500th post here on How Do You Do It?. Did the MoM bloggers who came together 6 years ago imagine that we’d have 1500 posts here today? I don’t know. I know they couldn’t have possibly imagined that we’d have an active presence on Pinterest or a vibrant community on Facebook.

How Do You Do It? has just published its 1500th post.

I don’t think that the founding members of HDYDI imagined that this blog would continue after they all moved on to other things, but it has. I certainly expect it to do so once my time here has come to an end.

There have been a lot of inspiring and insightful writers here over the years, 71 by my count, not including guest posters.

What really makes HDYDI a community, though, is its readership. New mothers of multiples have stumbled across it in a quest for others who understand their exhaustion and feelings of inadequacy. Expectant mothers who’ve just discovered they’re having more than one baby have sought out HDYDI in an attempt to understand what they’re in for. Parents of older multiples have come by trying to figure out what to do about classroom placement. Thousands of those moms have become regular readers. Hundreds have commented, sharing their own wisdom, recommendations, and perspectives. And a few have become writers here, giving HDYDI an identity of its own as individual writers come and go.

I thought about sharing a list of our best posts here, but how do you choose a favourite child? Instead, here are some that happen to stand out to me today:

Here’s to you, the supportive, accepting and creative HDYDI community, and to 1500 more posts over the years to come.

What would you like to see covered on HDYDI?

4 Questions to Connect with My Children

My daughters and I are very close. They’re talkers. I’m a talker. That makes it pretty easy for us to stay connected. We do a lot together, but talking is the big point of connection we share.

At 7 years old, M and J are starting to realize that I’m not quite as omniscient and all-powerful as they once thought, but I’m not yet uncool enough in their eyes for them to reject me. For the most part, they volunteer news from the day and keep me informed of the things that are important to them. They tell me about their schoolwork, their friends, and particularly delicious or gross food.

Why It Gets Harder to Connect with My Children

I haven’t spent the whole day with my kids for more than a long weekend and rare vacation since I returned to work when they were 11 weeks old. When they were in daycare, I got a note from school each day telling me about their feeding, diaper changes, and daily activities. I had a decent idea of what they’d been up to from those notes and conversations with the teacher. Once they entered kindergarten, though, I was reliant on my kids for news about their day.

I know that over time my children will naturally put more of a distance between us. While that is a normal part of growth, I always want them to know that I’m here for them, and I want to keep tabs on what they’re up to. I recognize that adolescence will be a time when my girls are moving towards adulthood and wanting adult-like privacy and say over the details of their own lives. I hope to be able to respect their desires for more adult-like treatment while providing them with the structure and support these teen children still need.

One Easy Way to Connect with My Children

Elementary school is a perfect time to establish habits to stay connected that will work for us when the children are older and venturing farther afield.

Every day, at some point, I ask each of my children the following questions:

  • What was the best thing that happened today?
  • What was the worst thing that happened?
  • What have you read today?
  • What was one thing you learned?

In addition to helping me know what’s been going on, these questions also encourage J and M to evaluate their experiences critically. Depending on how much else is we have to get done, any one of these questions can prompt a discussion lasting an hour or more.

One simple idea for keeping in touch with your kids. Just ask these 4 questions.

Examples of Connecting with My Children

The worst thing in J’s day yesterday was my need to work from home in the evening. I had some last minute responsibilities that had to be taken care of then and there. Over 10 of us were pulling overtime to make it work.

I only ended up having 15 minutes available to spend with the children apart from the few minutes we spent together in the car. We talked about prioritization and how sometimes being the person one group of people can rely on means letting down another group. I explained to J that she and her sister were the most important part of my life, but that there were times when I had to trust them to tend to themselves while I took care of other business. She wasn’t any happier with me after we’d talked, but she felt heard and knew that I understood how disappointed she was in me.

On days when M can’t come up with a “best thing” that happened, I know it’s been a rough day and that she needs extra attention from me while her sister is occupied with something else. On days when she comes up with a list of “best things” and no “worst thing”, I know that any arguing I hear between my daughters will easily resolve itself and I leave them be to work things out. J usually sees both aspects of her day, but M sees the world in black and white.

When my children are away, usually staying with grandparents thousands of miles from here, I use these questions during our daily phone call if the conversations starts to stall. I don’t usually need them any more, since my 7-year-olds are usually bursting with news to tell me. When they were younger, age 4 or so, having specific questions to answer was helpful to them, since they kept wanting to show me things over the phone, which didn’t work particularly well.

How do you stay connected to your kids when you’re not together all day?

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun. She also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.

Twice Exceptional Children

When you hear the term “special needs,” what do you think of? A child in a wheelchair, perhaps, or one fed through a feeding tube. Perhaps you think about someone who contends with dyslexia or autism.

Now think of the term “gifted.” Whom do you envision? The star math pupil or the young inventor, most likely. The prodigal musician or child poet. Perhaps the star athlete falls in this category.

The twice exceptional child is both gifted and has special needs. He or she is far beyond her years in one area while needing extra help in another. The twice exceptional child most likely to fall through the cracks is one whose giftedness may disguise their special needs or one whose special needs may mask their giftedness. It’s easy to categorize a child with an enormous vocabulary and incisive mind as lazy when they never complete their schoolwork, but what if, instead, they’re dealing with an attention deficit that has gone undiagnosed? The average child in a class may in fact be brilliant at math, but held back by dyslexia.

I had the privilege of attending a talk by Dr. Beverly Trail, author of Twice-Exceptional Gifted Children: Understanding, Teaching, and Counseling Gifted Students. She was hosted by the our school district’s gifted and talented program, and I learned a lot from her talk.

Twice-Exceptional Gifted Children by Beverly Trail

My daughters were identified early as being gifted. Some might argue that my daughter M also has special needs. In addition to her facial cleft and all the social fallout from looking different, M’s anxiety can sometimes be paralyzing.

Let this be a reminder not to pigeonhole the people you come across in one box or another. People are complex. A teacher friend of mine, Gloria, once told me that her approach to gifted children is to consider theirs to be just another type of special need. The gifted child needs personalized attention and education just like any other special needs child. I could have just kissed her for saying that, but I just hugged her instead.

Do you know what my exceptional, possibly twice exceptional, 7-year-old did at the talk on twice exceptional children, which she attended with me? She went up to Dr. Trail after her talk and asked her why, given that her points were relevant to all students and teachers, only those affiliated with the district’s gifted program were invited. Dr. Trail told her that she’d been specifically invited to speak to this audience, but that she agreed that her content wasn’t just for us. She also told M that her question was a very good one.

Because my child, like yours, is exceptional.

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun. She also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.

Foodie Friday: Weeknight Apple Crumble

Weeknight apple crumble. A quick solution to fresh apple pie.

Our weeknight hours are very limited. We get home between 6:30 and 7:00 and bedtime is 8:30. I try to squeeze as much quality as I can out of that time. My twin 7-year-olds and I talk about our days, discussing academics, relationships, and the international news. If I’m lucky, the girls will have liked the dinner served at childcare and I can put off my own dinner until they’re in bed. Sometimes, though, they come home without having eaten and I have to scramble to feed them before bath time.

I have a number of weeknight quick meals in my repertoire: hummus, chips and fresh fruit; turkey and cheese sandwiches with baby carrots; whole grain mac and cheese with frozen sweet corn. I can’t plan for these meals since I never know when the girls will decide that dinner at the YMCA is yucky.

On occasion, the girls will ask for dessert, and our default is ice cream. Last night, however, we had fresh-baked apple crumble. While I make a fine apple-cranberry pie in the winter, there’s no way I could whip one up in during the evening rush. Instead, on weeknights, I make a super-quick version of apple crumble

This is no healthy dish. It’s loaded with sugar and butter. However, I believe that giving in to hedonism every now and then is a good thing. I’m teaching my girls to indulge in moderation. And, as J put it the first time she tasted my apple crumble, “This is so good! The ingredients say it should taste like apple and sugar, but it tastes like love.”

Usually, when I share recipes, I at least pretend that I measure my ingredients and give measurable quantities alongside my ingredient list. You won’t get that here. Part of the way I keep this reasonable for weeknights is to minimize dishes that require washing. No measuring spoons. One mixing bowl. I pop the crumbles in the oven when I pop the girls in the bath and we eat them once the children are dry and dressed.

With no more ado, here’s my recipe:

Apple Crumble

  • Frozen single-serving pastry shells
  • 1 medium Granny Smith apple per 2 shells
  • Handful of brown sugar
  • 2 handfuls of all-purpose flour
  • Pinch of salt
  • Teensy touch of nutmeg
  • 1 handful of granulated sugar
  • Chunk of butter
  • (Optional) Handful of oats
  1. Preheat your oven to 350°F.
  2. Place your pastry shells on a baking sheet. If you think they need extra support, a muffin tin should help.
  3. Peel and core the apples. Dice into small pieces. We like the pieces tiny, but feel free to do as much chopping as you have time for.
  4. Place apples, brown sugar, salt, nutmeg and one handful of flour in a bowl. Mix. The mixture should glisten. If it looks watery, throw in some more flour.
  5. Divide the apple mixture between the pastry shells. Not enough apple? Mix up some more… or just make some extra crumble topping to fill it up.
  6. Mix the remaining flour, sugar and oats (if you’re using them). I just use the apple bowl because I’m lazy like that. Rub the butter into the mixture until it looks like breadcrumbs or you run out of time, whichever comes first.
  7. Divide the crumb topping between the apple-fixed shells.
  8. Bake for about 20 minutes. They’re done when you start to smell them. The apple mixture should be bubbling and the topping lightly browned.
  9. Remove children from bath and serve. Serve the crumbles to the children, that is, not the other way around.

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun. She also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.

When to Keep the News from Kids

The first time their father saw my daughters in the real world, in life-after-NICU, it was just off Old Ironsides Ave. on Fort Hood. I drove the 40 miles from our house to welcome Daddy home from NTC, the generically named National Training Center in California, where he’d been in desert training with his Army unit in preparation for another Iraq deployment. It was June 2006 and the babies had been home from the hospital for a few weeks.

Twins home from the hospital

I breastfed my babies in the car, less nervous that usual as a brand new breast-feeder. I knew that the federal laws that held sway on base were clear about my right to breastfeed. Furthermore, any potentially objecting soldiers would back of the moment I waved the printout of the law I kept in my diaper bag at them. I’m delighted to report that I never had need to pull out that printout.

I have a love/hate relationship with Fort Hood. It is so very, well, military. It’s all squares and tan and straight lines. Vehicles with a primary purpose of combat are on display everywhere. Everyone obeys the speed limit. Everyone manages to be extraordinarily polite while swearing every third word. People called me Mrs. SGT Rod. I’ve always gone by Ms in the rest of the world and really prefer Sadia, but try telling soldiers that.

I haven’t been to Fort Hood since I got divorced. We still have a couple of friends who live in neighbouring towns, but plans to meet up have fallen through. Still, when I heard today’s news about the shooting on base, I felt that sick feeling I used to have when my now ex-husband was deployed and yet another casualty was reported on the radio. I’ve checked in with friends who work there, and everyone is accounted for.

Feeling close to workplace shootings isn’t new to me. For years, I worked on the 25th floor of the building in and from which Charles Whitman killed 14 people in 1966. A neighbor of mine was on base during the last Fort Hood shooting, although my husband at the time was nowhere near there, instead at a relatively cushy assignment in South Korea. Most recently, I was under lockdown myself during a student’s tragic breakdown. It never gets normal, though. It’s disturbing and surreal every single time.

I wonder, though, if we’re suffering from mass shooting saturation. My Facebook feed, usually on fire with thoughts, updates and prayers for whatever’s been in the news lately, was nearly silent about today’s shooting. The only people who even mentioned it were friends from the Army and friends otherwise associated with the military. When I asked on Facebook why everyone was silent on today’s tragedy, the response was that no one even knew it had happened.

I usually talk to my daughters about the news of the day. Their father has served in two wars. They’re not ignorant of the ugliness present in the world. They know in vague terms about what’s going on in Syria and Ukraine. J followed the search for Libya’s Gaddafi closely.

I think I’m going to keep the radio off or tuned to music for the next few days, at least when the children are in the car. Maybe, completely selfishly speaking, it’s a good thing that no one seems to want to talk about what happened today. I don’t know how to tell my girls about this crazed killing without frightening them. I have no answers, explanations, or comfort. I have no way to convince my daughters that Daddy is safe on his base or that I’ll be safe at work. I don’t know why or when to keep the news from kids, but I will this time.

But for a moment, let’s speak more generally, human to human. Four people died today, not far from my home, at a place that once was, for better or worse, a big part of my life. Many many more are dying much uglier deaths in Syria. You can spare a thought for them. It costs you nothing.

Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 7-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. She lives with them and their 3 cats in the Austin, TX suburbs and works full time as a business analyst. She retired her personal blog, Double the Fun. She also blogs at Adoption.com and Multicultural Mothering.