Twinkly Tuesday, November 24, 2015

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Welcome to this week’s Twinkly Tuesday, the link party hosted by Lisa at Mummascribbles. This is our final week of hosting for Caro of The Twinkle Diaries and me.

Twinkly Tuesday participants are generous commenters and talented writers. I have met so many wonderful people here, but none more so than Lisa and Caro. They have been friends, cheerleaders, supporters, and counselors over the last several months, and their friendship alone has been worth all the work that goes into keeping this linky running. There are so many others that I’ve met through Twinkly Tuesday, bloggers I will absolutely keep reading.

However, I simply cannot keep up any more as a host. 40-50 posts to read and comment on every week had begun to feel like an obligation rather than a joy, just because of all the demands on my time. The children come first. I look forward to returning to the ranks of Twinkly Tuesday participant.

Twinkly Tuesday will continue

Going it alone means that Lisa will make some changes. She is taking this opportunity to make Twinkly Tuesday less time-consuming to host. As of next week (December 1), look for the following changes will be coming into play.

  • No more reminder tweets on Tuesday mornings. Instead, you’ll get a reminder email.
  • Hosts will no longer comment on every post linked up. This makes it all the more crucial that you comment on the post before yours. Let Lisa know if you don’t receive any comments on a linked post. Twinkly Tuesday is mature enough to self-police!
  • Lisa will still retweet all your #TwinklyTuesday tweets, assuming you mention her @mummascribbles.
  • Lisa will choose a Tuesday Twinkler.
  • If you are linking up for the first time, do let Lisa know so that she can add you to her reminder email list.

We hope that you understand my reasons, and Caro’s for stepping away. Thank you, thank you, thank you all for opening your hearts, making me cry, and making me laugh myself silly.

It’s time. Just link up one post and comment on as many others as you can – including the one directly before yours.

If you are featured this week, be sure to claim your fame by adding the Twinkly Tuesday Twinkler badge to your blog.

My Tuesday Twinkler is a mortifying tale of an outing during potty training from Mummy Muckups with a heartwarming moment of parental solidarity. Just read Anna’s post. Both the content and the storytelling are lovely. Well, maybe just the storytelling.

A tale of potty training woe and parental solidarity.

 

Lisa’s Tuesday Twinkler is Heather’s beautiful tribute to her grandfather on One Crazy Ride. The photos, words, and feelings are uplifting and filled with love. The idea of his having over 100 grandchildren and great grandchildren is more than I can quite conceive.

A tribute from Heather to her grandfather.Caro’s Tuesday Twinkler is a thought provoker from Tiny Tyger, Baby Bear and Me. Now that Lady Nym is reasonable sure that both her children are autistic, she ponders whether she would seek a cure for autism, if such a thing existed. It’s not as straightforward as you might think.

 

Pills

Take a moment to visit these posts, if you can. We would love it if you paid a visit to the other host links, and any others that look interesting.

On with this week’s link-up!

Link up a post, old or new, that you think deserves more readers!

Twitter: Be sure to mention me — @hdydi, Lisa — @mummascribbles, or Caro — @twinklediaries, on Twitter and please use the hashtag #TwinklyTuesday. We’ll be sure to retweet every tweet tagged!

Lisa will pick the post to be featured on the following week’s Twinkly Tuesday page.

There are a few easy rules to follow, to ensure that everyone’s posts get the attention they deserve. Please do make the effort to abide by the rules, in fairness to the vast majority who do.

  • Link up one post per week — old or new.
  • Please be kind enough to add the Twinkly Tuesday badge to the bottom of your post/s or your linky page. (Scroll down for the code.) If you haven’t (yet) been featured, please make sure you’re using this badge and not the featured one.
  • Please comment on at least two other posts including the one directly before yours. Visit and comment on as many others as you can. Of course, checking out the hosts’ posts would make us feel very loved.
  • Please use #TwinklyTuesday in your comments so people know where you found them!
  • By linking up, you give us permission to use images from your blog if featured. You also allow us to add you to a mailing list to receive a weekly announcement when Twinkly Tuesday opens.
  • The linky closes at 23.55 GMT tonight.

We look forward to reading all of your fantastic blog posts and seeing you again next week! Remember to grab our button!

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Twinkly Tuesday

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An Open Letter to Marissa Mayer

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Categories Parenting10 Comments

Dear Ms Mayer,

I know that you get a lot of flak. Because of your job as a relatively young female CEO of a high profile company, the world reads into your personal decisions all sorts of gender stereotypes and norms. You may have no interest in serving as a feminist symbol, whether icon or patsy.

I’m not writing to you as a feminist (which I am) or to criticize how you achieve family-work balance. Instead, I’d like to talk to you working MoM to working MoM. First off, congratulations on your identical twin daughters! I wish for you a healthy and comfortable pregnancy.

Welcome to the most wonderful club in the world, that of Parents of Multiples. While I’m sure that every parent of several revels in their children’s sibling relationships, there’s something magical and humbling about the wombmate bond. The identical bond is even deeper. I’m a mother of identical twin daughters myself, and close as we are, I can only marvel on the beautiful intimacy of their unique relationship.

The fact that you already know that your daughters are identical makes me suspect that your daughters may share a membrane and/or placenta. Of course, you may have conducted genetic testing and have a di/di pregnancy. If your girls do share a placenta, though, that makes your pregnancy a high risk one. Like you, I intended to work right until the moment that I went into labour, but the babies had a different idea. I started having preterm labour symptoms that forced me to reduce my work hours at 31 weeks gestation. Please listen to your body, which may not have quite the commitment to working all the way through your pregnancy that our work ethics have.

I wish for you your dream birth. However, we MoMs often don’t get that luxury. In fact, about 75% of twin births are C-sections. In my own case, I had to have an emergency C-section because one daughter’s water broke and both babies were breech. Even though it was only 3 hours from entering labour to delivery, Twin A was in distress by the time she was born.

Ms Mayer, please allow me to assure you that a C-section is major surgery. Yes, it’s standard surgery, but even a run-of-the-mill Caesarean involves cutting through multiple organs, each of which must heal. You’ll need time to let your body stitch itself together, ideally with minimal scar tissue. The scar tissue from my C-section has left me unable to have sex without excruciating pain. Like every other mother, your organs will be moving into their post-pregnancy arrangement, which may not look like where they were before you got pregnant. All this will be happening in the first days of your daughters’ lives, when they need you and you’re enveloped in visitors and well wishers. Allow yourself to heal, please.

I hope for your girls the full term gestation that my daughters were denied. I had a picture perfect pregnancy, but my sweet girls were still born at 33 weeks, less than 4 lbs each. They’re doing fine now, but they were in the hospital for just over 2 weeks. If your little babies were to follow the same schedule as mine, your commitment to return to work when they are 2 weeks old would put you at the office when they are released from the NICU. I wouldn’t recommend it.

A mom with one of her identical twins, born at 33 weeks gestation. Identical twin pregnancy risks are real.Don’t get me wrong. I, too, considered returning to work relatively early. While my girls were in the NICU, I considered returning to the office. I thought this would let me have a few weeks home with them once they were released. I was ready to start the paperwork when a NICU nurse told me to hold off. Our daughters would be home in days, not weeks.

I honestly thought I was in control of the schedule, but pregnancies have their own ebb and flow, as do newborns. Our bodies and those of our babies run the show. I hope that you have everything you dream of, but in your commitments during this pregnancy and its aftermath, I ask you to leave room for the unknown. Identical twin pregnancy risks are all too real.

Sincerely,

Sadia Rodriguez

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Twinfant Tuesday: The Tale of the Holiday Girl

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Once upon a time there was a girl who loooooved the holidays.  She loved the decorating and cooking.  She couldn’t wait to wrap and bake.  She enjoyed every part of the holidays: the smells, the planning, the parties, the crafting.  She loved it all!  When The Holiday Girl grew up she had lots of babies.  At first she had them one at a time.  Three little boys came all in a row.  Thankfully, her babies loved to snuggle so she’d wear them close to her heart and still get to enjoy her favorite time of the year. One cold February day The Holiday Girl got the best Valentine’s Day surprise ever! She found out she was having twins! Twins could only make the holidays better! She thought about tiny pilgrim hats and little stockings.  She dreamed of 2 extra place settings at the Thanksgiving table and 2 tiny twin themed Christmas trees. The birth came and went and finally the babies’ first holidays were approaching.  The Holiday Girl was beside herself! Oh the plans she had! So much cooking, and crafting, and shopping; she couldn’t even sleep from the excitement.  But something odd was happening. The closer Thanksgiving got the more anxious The Holiday Girl became.  Where she was usually calm and happy this year she felt overwhelmed and frazzled.  Nothing was going as planned.  She couldn’t get the shopping done, because the babies wouldn’t settle for a nap. She struggled to finish the adorable placemats she was making because the babies always wanted to nurse.  Forget about making extra pies for the older boys’ teachers she was drowning in laundry.  The Holiday Girl was sad and grouchy and confused. “Let us help” said her family. “What can we do?” asked her friends.  “No and Nothing” The Holiday Girl always replied.  She struggled to finish her to do lists and finally Thanksgiving Day came.  The Holiday Girl woke up extra early in anticipation of the extra time she would need for the babies.  By 10:30 she was sweating and no where close to on schedule.  Guests would be arriving and she had no appetizers and was still dressed in her pajamas. This wouldn’t do.  This wasn’t the way The Holiday Girl hosted events. Somehow Thanksgiving dinner got made but The Holiday Girl didn’t enjoy cooking it.  She was angry to be stuck in the kitchen while everyone else was enjoying the day.  Somehow she set the table, but The Holiday Girl was so frazzled that she forgot to use the placemats she had fretted over getting done.  The dishes were washed and dessert was served, but neither task was done with the usual care and love The Holiday Girl normally completed them with.  All she could think about was how much work everything was and how tired she felt.  At the end of the day when the house was asleep The Holiday Girl replayed the day in her mind. She realized she hadn’t taken one single picture.  She hadn’t noticed how the babies reacted to the house full of people.  She hadn’t watched the cousins play together or the grandparents enjoy the new twins.  She’d missed everything.  She’d missed her babies’ first Thanksgiving.  The Holiday Girl realized right then that Christmas would have to be different.  And so it was.

I have a confession to make.  I’m The Holiday Girl and I missed my twins first Thanksgiving because I wouldn’t ask for help.  Looking back I realize that the only time I interacted with the babies that day was when they wanted to nurse.  As soon as they were done I passed them to the nearest adult and scurried back to the kitchen.  I still cringe when I think about that.

If you are a MoM with new multiples don’t worry! I’ve come up with 4 questions you can ask yourself to ensure you don’t become The Holiday Girl:

  1. Who can I ask for help? Be creative. Do you know someone with a tween that would like to earn some extra money by wrapping your gifts? Know anyone with teen boys that could pick up a Christmas Tree for you, hang lights, get your holiday décor down from the attic?  What about a teenager or young adult who could fight the Thanksgiving crowds and do your grocery shopping for you? Use Facebook as your job board.  Post what tasks you’d like help with and see who’s interested.  You’ll be surprised who answers.
  2. What can I give up now and start again later?  If you usually host Thanksgiving would someone else mind doing it this year? Advent calendars are adorable and fun, but can be a lot of work to set up.  Do you really need to use every box of decorations or could just putting up a tree work for this year? It’s hard not to be emotional when it comes to holiday traditions. It can feel like you’re losing an old friend. Try to remember that the babies will be older next year and you can add back what you missed.
  3. What shortcuts can I take? Grandma’s sugar cookie recipe is amazing but it’s messy and time consuming.  What about Easy Bake cookies this year? Could you order your side dishes from a deli or restaurant? Instead of Christmas Cards with envelopes try postcards – no stuffing  When you have infant multiples time is a luxury. Don’t waste it on things that aren’t really important to you.
  4. Do I have realistic expectations?  How much traveling can you reasonably do this year? How many guests can you accommodate? Having more than one infant makes everything more complicated. Be kind to yourselves and commit to doing less than what you feel capable of.  When you’re tired and anxious about getting your to do list finished you will be glad you didn’t sign up for more.

The holidays are such a magical time when you have a house full of babies! Keeping things simple and asking for help will make sure that you won’t miss a moment. Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

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Twinkly Tuesday, November 17, 2015

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Skip to Tuesday Twinklers | Skip to rules | Skip to participant badge | Skip to this week’s links

Welcome to this week’s Twinkly Tuesday, the link party hosted by Sadia here at HDYDI, with Lisa at Mummascribbles and Caro of The Twinkle Diaries. Twinkly Tuesday is forum to meet new people, share a post, and read blogs you might never come across elsewhere. Twinkly Tuesday participants are generous commenters and talented writers.

We have an announcement:

After next week, Caro and I will be stepping down as co-hosts.

Caro and I both offered to join Lisa as hosts of Twinkly Tuesday because we loved the community and the way that everyone supported each other by taking the time to read and comments on posts. Unfortunately, between how large this linky has become and because of the increasing demands of our jobs and growing children, we simply can’t give Twinkly Tuesday the attention in deserves.

Twinkly Tuesday will continue

Going it alone means that Lisa will have to make some changes to be able to handle the workload. After examining a number of options, including replacing us with new co-hosts, Lisa is taking this opportunity to make Twinkly Tuesday less time-consuming to host.

As of December 1, please be aware of the following changes will be coming into play.

  • Lisa will no longer be sending out reminder tweets on Tuesday mornings. Instead, you will receive a reminder email.
  • She will no longer comment on all of the posts that are linked up. That said, the Twinkly Tuesday community has been lovely. The vast majority of linkers always stick to the rules of commenting on the post before yours. Lisa won’t be able to police this as we have in the past; she asks you to let her know if you don’t receive any comments on a linked post.
  • Lisa will still be retweeting all your #TwinklyTuesday tweets, assuming you mention her. She’ll still be choosing a Tuesday Twinkler.
  • If you are linking up for the first time, do let Lisa know so that she can add you to her reminder email list.

We hope that you understand our reasons for stepping away, and that you continue to help Twinkly Tuesday be as successful as it is. Just link up one post and comment on as many others as you can – including the one directly before yours.

If you are featured this week, be sure to claim your fame by adding the Twinkly Tuesday Twinkler badge to your blog.

My Tuesday Twinkler is a guest post from Caitlin on Chirpy Chatterbox. Caitlin sheds some light on childhood apraxia of speech. As a mother of children with speech delays who successfully graduated from speech therapy, I’m aware of how overwhelming a speech diagnosis can be. Caitlin helps explain what this condition is and what you can expect.

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Lisa’s Tuesday Twinkler is from Dancing Dandelions. She talks about the positive story that finally made her get her pap smear done, and how painless it was.

 

NoFearGoSmear

Caro’s Tuesday Twinkler is actually mine, right here on How Do You Do It? It’s on how I, single mother of twins, do it all… or more accurately, how I don’t.

Learn one mother's secret

 

Take a moment to visit these posts, if you can. We would love it if you paid a visit to the other host links, and any others that look interesting.

On with this week’s link-up!

Link up a post, old or new, that you think deserves more readers!

Twitter: Be sure to mention me — @hdydi, Lisa — @mummascribbles, or Caro — @twinklediaries, on Twitter and please use the hashtag #TwinklyTuesday. We’ll be sure to retweet every tweet tagged!

We’ll also visit everyone’s posts and leave comments between us.

For one more week, all three of us will pick the posts to be featured on the following week’s Twinkly Tuesday page.

There are a few easy rules to follow, to ensure that everyone’s posts get the attention they deserve. Please do make the effort to abide by the rules, in fairness to the vast majority who do. We have been forced to block participation for repeat offenders who haven’t responded to multiple reminders.

  • Link up one post per week — old or new.
  • Please be kind enough to add our badge to the bottom of your post/s or your linky page. (Scroll down for the code.) If you haven’t (yet) been featured, please make sure you’re using this badge and not the featured one.
  • Please comment on at least two other posts including the one directly before yours. Visit and comment on as many others as you can. Of course, checking out the hosts’ posts would make us feel very loved.
  • Please use #TwinklyTuesday in your comments so people know where you found them!
  • By linking up, you give us permission to use images from your blog if featured. You also allow us to add you to a mailing list to receive a weekly announcement when Twinkly Tuesday opens.
  • The linky closes at 23.55 GMT tonight.

We look forward to reading all of your fantastic blog posts and seeing you again next week! Remember to grab our button!

Grab buttons for Twinkly Tuesday

Here’s how to add our badge to your site. Enter HTML editing mode on your post, sidebar, or page. Copy the code in the box below and paste it into your site in your code/html view. Save and publish. That’s it!

Twinkly Tuesday

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How Much Should We Tell Children?

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Categories Mommy Issues, Parenting, PerspectiveTags , 32 Comments

The recent events in Paris are unthinkable. The unlivable circumstances in Syria defy reason. The devastation in Beirut is horrific. There is so much ugliness in the world.

I don’t believe in shielding my daughters completely from what goes on outside our immediate sphere, but I also think that it’s my job to mediate this knowledge and protect children’s right to feel safe.

All we parents are back in the quandary of talking to children about terrorism. There’s no one right way to approach it. I had the radio on for a little while driving, but the children were too absorbed in their books to notice what was being said. If it were a different week, I might have chosen to mention the Paris tragedy to my girls, but they’re already dealing with a challenging time within the extended family.

Tomorrow, my 9-year-olds will be back at school. All I can do is prepare myself for any questions they ask and reassure them that they are safe, that our little suburb is too unimportant to be a target, and that Daddy and his soldier friends are out there keeping us safe.

Much as I hate the apathy of the Western world toward tragedy occurring outside our borders, right now the mother in me is grateful. That very apathy is keeping my daughters from feeling that grief, anger, and fear that the Paris attacks have brought me.

Update – Monday, Nov 16

This morning, one of my girls asked me about the Paris attacks. “Mommy, there were bad guy shooters in Paris?” I told her that there were. Her sister had been entirely unaware and wanted details. I just told her that some bad guys decided that shooting a bunch of people would be a good idea, like on 9/11.

Then my first daughter asked whether it wouldn’t make sense if the news people only broadcast kid-friendly stories during the time that most children were being driven to school. I told her that it was parents’ responsibility to determine what’s appropriate for their children, not journalists’. There are plenty of stories that I choose not to let them hear, but I strike a balance between letting them know that people in the world are generally good, but that there are people who make really bad decisions. Unless we have some awareness of the suffering of others, we wouldn’t be able to fully appreciate what we have.

“That’s good, Mommy,” she told me. “That’s a good balance.”

Once again, my children clarified for me parenting decisions that I was over-thinking. Whatever I may be teaching my children, they teach me so much more.

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Wouldn’t Do Without Wednesday: Primo Bathtub

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primo-eurobath-kit-in-white-2404856-01

This is the Primo bathtub. We have used it every single day since we brought out first daughter home from the hospital, right up until we moved and finally decided to retire it. It has served us faithfully for almost 5.5 years. And amazingly, my eldest used it for almost as long.

It’s made to be an infant-toddler-in-one bathtub. You can see there is a side molded for an infant (I used a towel to keep them from slipping around when they were really little), and a side for a larger more upright child. BigSis never did turn herself around to the other side though, she just scooted down and bent her legs. And we would often bathe the twins in it together. They fit perfectly, one on each side. When I finished with one, the other would switch sides to get the perfect angle for hair rinsing while lying on the backrest.

My kids loved the safety that this tub provided. They knew that the molded sides would keep them from falling over in the water. For that same reason, I was able to fill the tub to a more comfortable level, to cover more of their bodies so they didn’t get cold. It was also nice to be able to fill it so quickly and not waste water.

We all loved this tub so much that I always wished we could take it with us whenever we were staying overnight anywhere else. In fact, is has made a couple of trips to Grandma’s house, but we always missed it on vacations.

Now that they’re older, the kids are all taking their baths together in the big tub now. We are still saving water in that they are sharing, they love to “swim” in the big tub, and there are perks to being able to shower them off in the end, but I still look back and remember our Primo bathtub fondly.

lunchldyd is mom to almost-3yo b/g twins and their 5.5yo sister. Bathtime isn’t always her favorite time of day, but she knows it will one day be something else she misses.

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Twinfant Tuesday: Birth Stories

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From the moment we saw and heard two heartbeats, I knew that life was going to change in a huge way. Immediately my thoughts went to pregnancy complications. Would both babies be healthy? Would I carry them to term? I was afraid to get too attached to the babies for fear that something would go wrong. My husband, on the other hand, blurted during the ultrasound that we were going to need a minivan. But I knew from my reading (I’ve always had a fascination with twins) and friends’ twins that prematurity and congenital defects were risks with twin pregnancies.

At every appointment I was cautiously optimistic. When they became more “real,” I began to hope for a set of b/g twins (we knew they were fraternal). I thought that the best since same-gender twins would have to live with constant comparisons to each other. Lo and behold, at 20 weeks that is exactly what we found out. To this day I still don’t know how I got so lucky as to call the gender of every one of my births.

With my doctor’s approval, I stopped working at 28 weeks, then appointments at 32, 34, 35, 36, 37 weeks, and all seemed to be going well. Of course at this point I was huge and not so very mobile, but I’ve always loved being pregnant (don’t hate me!), and knowing my babies were thriving gave me joy every moment of every day.

Finally my csection was scheduled for 38 weeks at 7am the Monday after Thanksgiving. So Sunday night we were getting ready: hospital bag, BigSis stuff, shipping her off to my mom’s. Then we went to bed, but I never fully slept. I ended up getting up around midnight feeling lousy (which were contractions, but I didn’t know it then because with BigSis my water broke and I had an epidural right when I got to the hospital– but, that’s another story). After fighting the feeling for another couple of hours thinking it would go away, I told my groggy husband we should probably head to the hospital early. We got there at 3am, two hours before my scheduled check-in time.

Turns out I was 4.5cm dilated already. Everyone was pretty surprised I had gone into labor on my own just hours before I was scheduled for surgery (coincidentally this is almost exactly what happened with BigSis as well). So the babies arrived two hours before they were scheduled, at 4:58 and 4:59am. They had been transverse, which probably contributed to my mostly-comfortable pregnancy. I clearly remember the gushing of amniotic fluid (twice!) when the doctor went in and opened up their sacs to get them out. I also remember meeting my little babies one after the other, thinking they looked huge. It was no wonder though, they were the size of full-term single birth babies: 6 lbs. 5oz. and 6 lbs. 10 oz. And they were perfect.

I knew then, and even more so looking back, that we were so so very blessed that the babies were full-term and healthy. I am extremely grateful. Now that we have gotten the dreaded minivan and pricey bigger house, and on trying days when they have tantrums back-to-back, I should remember this more :)

lunchldyd is mom to almost-3yo b/g twins and their 5.5yo sister. Between working mornings, kindergarten, preschool, kids’ activities, remodeling/moving into a new house, and daily tantrums, she is… not complaining.

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Twinkly Tuesday, November 10, 2015

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Skip to Tuesday Twinklers | Skip to rules | Skip to participant badge | Skip to this week’s links

Welcome to this week’s Twinkly Tuesday, the link party hosted by Sadia here at HDYDI, with Lisa at Mummascribbles and Caro of The Twinkle Diaries. Thanks for bearing with us during my two-week hiatus.

Twinkly Tuesday is forum to meet new people, share a post, and read blogs you might never come across elsewhere. Twinkly Tuesday participants are generous commenters and talented writers.

Each week Lisa, Caro, and I choose a favourite post. If you have been featured, be sure to claim your fame by adding the Twinkly Tuesday Twinkler badge to your blog.

Lisa’s Tuesday Twinkler is from Carry on Katy. Katy’s “5 Benefits of Being Middle Aged” will have you in stitches.

Five reasons that being middle aged is the way to go!

Caro’s Tuesday Twinkler is from The Redundant Mum. In her post, “One Journey, Three Sticks“, Lianne introduces a wonderful outdoor adventure idea that her children love. Check out her post to see if journey sticking might be a fun outdoor activity for your family too.

Journey sticking is a great way to get your children experiencing the outdoors.

Take a moment to visit these posts, if you can. We would love it if you paid a visit to the other host links, and any others that look interesting.

On with this week’s link-up!

Link up a post, old or new, that you think deserves more readers!

Twitter: Be sure to mention me — @hdydi, Lisa — @mummascribbles, or Caro — @twinklediaries, on Twitter and please use the hashtag #TwinklyTuesday. We’ll be sure to retweet every tweet tagged!

We’ll also visit everyone’s posts and leave comments between us.

Each week, all three of us pick the posts to be featured on the following week’s Twinkly Tuesday page.

There are a few easy rules to follow, to ensure that everyone’s posts get the attention they deserve. Please do make the effort to abide by the rules, in fairness to the vast majority who do. We have been forced to block participation for repeat offenders who haven’t responded to multiple reminders.

  • Link up one post per week — old or new.
  • Please be kind enough to add our badge to the bottom of your post/s or your linky page. (Scroll down for the code.) If you haven’t (yet) been featured, please make sure you’re using this badge and not the featured one.
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MomCom 2015

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Categories ParentingLeave a comment

On the off chance that any HDYDI readers will be attending MomCom in Austin tomorrow, I’d like to invite you all to come and say hello. I’ll be helping out at registration and would love to meet you!

Here’s what I look like… when I’ve had time to brush my hair, put in contact lenses, and have the cash to hire a professional photographer.

Sadia

Ha! Far more often, I look this this: wearing my daughters’ artwork and surrounded by books and laundry. You might need to look down. I’m very short.

Meet Sadia of How Do You Do It?

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Twin Toddlers: Wishful Thinking

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Categories Parenting, Toddlers2 Comments

I have recurring daydream.  It’s not reminiscent of fifty shades of whatever or spending the day at the spa alone.  It’s not having a chef and personal trainer.  It’s not being given the vacation of a lifetime or a shopping spree for a whole new wardrobe.  In my dream I’m gifted a service dog.  Yep, you read that right.  I want a twin wrangling, sanity saving, furry friend. I long for a gorgeous, well trained German Shepard named Gretchen.  I know I could hire a mother’s helper, but wouldn’t it would be so much simpler to just yell “Go, Gretchen!”?  Gretchen and I would be a team. We would work together to conquer this mess of toddlerness named Laurel and Rhodes.

There is nothing I hate more than the in and out routine associated with car seats.  It’s even more painful when there are two car seats to unfasten and refasten.  And let’s not even talk about how frustrating it is when the errand I’m running is quicker than it takes me to get both toddlers out of their car seats and buckled into their stroller (which is made so much harder because they insist on flopping around like catfish out of water).  If I had Gretchen she could stand guard over the twins while I ran my quick errand, or better yet, SHE could run my errand for me.  Gretchen could fetch my preschooler from his class and bring him to the car, she could mail the package, she could buy diapers.  Ok, maybe not buy diapers, but you get the drift.

Rhodes and Laurel are notorious for wandering away.  They don’t do this in the traditional toddler fashion where you see your child getting a little too far away and you can call to them.  My duo has mastered what I call the Ninja Stealth Wander.  I’ll give you an example that happened today.  I was checking out at the dentist office and the twins were literally standing on my feet.  Like right on my feet.  Hurting my toes.  I passed my debit card across the counter, looked down, and they were gone.  Poof! It hadn’t been more than 45 seconds since I’d seen them.  Right as I start to get alarmed a technician turns the corner with the twins.  She’d found them trying to get a drink from the water fountain.  Gretchen would have never allowed that to happen.  She would instinctively grab any toddler that wanders further than arm’s length away from me.  She would also know to grab any twin walking into a mud puddle, or accepting a blue snow cone.

How many times have you gotten situated to change a diaper or start the nap time routine only to find you’re missing one crucial item?  You know if you get up it means both toddlers will also get up and then you’ll have to play Catch the Twin all over again.  My ever helpful Gretchen would be able to bring me the blankey or the wipes in these situations.  This skill would also prove useful in the evenings when I’m just too exhausted to get the corkscrew or chocolate.

I freely admit that I rely on technology to entertain the masses when I get overwhelmed or have a task I really need to get done.  While this isn’t ideal, there are so many quality apps and videos available I never hardly feel any guilt over it.  Keeping the devices working and charged is a challenge for me.  With five kids in the family chargers get lost and screens get shattered on a semi regular basis.  It’s a frustrating and expensive problem.  In my daydreams Gretchen has the ability sniff out lost chargers and swoop in to catch devices before they hit the floor.

Having a toddler is hard.  Having twin toddlers (or more) is exponentially more difficult.  Feeling overwhelmed and inadequate seem to come with the territory.  While I may not have a Gretchen to relieve some of the stress, indulging in the occasional off the wall daydream and keeping my sense of humor help keep things in perspective.  This time is short. Try to roll with it and be kind to yourself. We are all doing the very best we can.

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