To Match or Not to Match

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Categories From the Mouths of Multiples, Identical, Older Children, Same Gender, School-AgeTags ,

My 6-year-old twin daughters’ closet contains some duplicates, but not many. When the girls were toddlers, I did dress them alike with with some frequency. We were still going through the enormously generous supply of mostly matching clothes for our baby showers. As they’ve grown, though, they’ve matched less and less. First, they stopped wearing exactly the same thing, although they’d generally coordinate their outfits. If one was wearing a skirt and Tshirt, so was the other. If Sissy was wearing a dress, then so was Sissy.

They don’t bother much with that these days. We don’t even get matchy matchy for formal photos any more.

J, M and Sadia, all in different sweater dresses.
Photo by Brandi Nellis

While I don’t think that my identical girls look a thing alike–their voices are an altogether different manner–people still get them confused. Just yesterday, I witnessed a schoolfriend try to get J’s attention by calling her M. It didn’t work. I wonder if that has something to do with their opting to dress differently.

Yesterday, M pulled out a favourite black sweater dress to wear to school. Her sister J is wearing it in the picture above, and we have two of them.

J’s eyes lit up. “Wanna match?” she asked her sister.

“Sure!” M replied.

“I don’t want to any more,” J responded.

And that’s why I don’t bother shopping doubles any more.

How do your kids feel about wearing matching or coordinating outfits?

Sadia is the single mother of almost-7yo identical twins, M and J. They live in Central Texas, where Sadia works in higher education IT.

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Sadia (rhymes with Nadia) has been coordinating How Do You Do It? since late 2012. She is the divorced mother of 10-year-old monozygotic twins, M and J. They live in the Austin, TX suburbs, where Sadia works full time in information technology. She contributes to a number of parenting websites and magazines and also runs The Mommy Blogging Guide, where she answers mommy bloggers' technical questions.

7 thoughts on “To Match or Not to Match”

  1. Our girls are four. When I can, I try to buy coordinating outfits for them…the same shirt, but in a different colorway, for example. For us, that cuts down on decisions about what to wear. The girls are usually content with my suggestion for the day, “How about these shirts with jeans?” and they take turns picking which shirt of the two that they want to wear.

    When the girls started preschool last fall, I realized I had more things matching that I would have thought. I found myself buying a few new items so they wouldn’t “have” to match…at least for a while. The feeling surprised me a bit, but I found myself feeling very strongly that I didn’t want them to match, hoping it would help their teachers and classmates see them as separate people.

    Occasionally the girls want to match, and that’s fine with me. We just pick something for which there’s a duplicate.

    My “guilty pleasure” is pajamas, though. I almost always buy two sets…I cannot resist the cuteness of my wee ones running down the hall in the same adorable polka dots (or whatever). 😉

  2. I have trouble MATCHING my b/g twins. Surprisingly, few brands make matching outfits for both genders. Overly girly styles and ruffles usually make me want to gag (Toddler was dressed in neutrals a lot as a baby, but Baby Girl has been getting lots of pinks and purples), so I wish more girls’ clothing can just be a copy of the very comfortable boys’ styles in a different color or whatnot.

  3. lunchldyd: I was helping a friend pick clothes for her b/g twins’ photos, and it was so hard! We didn’t even bother trying to look in one place for things that would work together. I have seen some cute coordinated b/g outfits in the CWD Kids catalogue, but it’s definitely outside my price range.

  4. I match my girls most of the time. I try to get outfits indifferent colorways so they don’t match exactly, if possible. They are fraternal (one blonde, one brunette) so they still look different. I worry about dressing one girl “cuter” than the other, so I dress them the same. Also, right now it is just easier for me to match them. I’m sure once they are picking their own clothes, it will be a different story.

  5. I used to do same dresses in different colors. But now I have sets, in the sense that the outfits maybe completely different but I offer them the dresses that I have brought together. It sometimes works out and sometimes it doesn’t

    Since I buy 2 different outfits – I do have to take care that one of them is not too cute/eye catching/ bright and happy looking/pricey over the other. So clothes shopping is a bit of a challenge for me.

  6. I’m so glad to see other moms talking about one child dressing “cuter” than the other. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it for a long time, but I realized (when I kept trying to shop consignment sales, to no avail) that that was my hang-up. It’s definitely a “first world problem”, I know, but I never want one child to seem to have been “favored” over the other.

  7. my ID twins McKenna and McKenzie are also 7 thay pick out there own clothes thay have a few non matching clothes but thay like to dress matching or at lest the same shirt different colors most of the time in my opinion thay are adorable in matching outfits and thats mostly how thay like it and i know thay will opt out of matching stuff as thay get older witch m fine with

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